Thread: The Confession of Sherlock Holmes - A Love Song

“Day by day they watched eagerly for her. One day they said to each other, Let us be off for home, it is time for lunch. So they went out and parted; but both turned back, and when they met again, they asked each other the reason. They admitted their lust, and then they agreed to look for an occasion when they could meet her alone. One day, while they were waiting for the right moment, she entered the garden as usual, with two maids only. She decided to bathe, for the weather was warm. Nobody else was there except the two elders, who had hidden themselves and were watching her. Bring me oil and soap, she said to the maids, and shut the garden doors while I bathe. They did as she said; they shut the garden doors and left by the side gate to fetch what she had ordered, unaware that the elders were hidden inside. As soon as the maids had left, the two old men got up and hurried to her. Look, they said, the garden doors are shut, and no one can see us; give in to our desire, and lie with us. If you refuse, we will testify against you that you dismissed your maids because a young man was here with you. I am completely trapped, Susanna groaned. If I yield, it will be my death; if I refuse, I cannot escape your power. Yet it is better for me to fall into your power without guilt than to sin before the Lord. Then Susanna shrieked, and the old men also shouted at her, as one of them ran to open the garden doors.”

—Daniel 13:13 – 25

If there ever was a chance that I could be with you,
Given any shred of hope, or perhaps a clue
That indeed, we could be together—
I fear that it’s impossible now,
My soul possessed by a demonic cow—
Your look, rude, unbending, lusty, makes me think of myself,
And all the books which constitute my bookshelf;
For I am indebted now only to my corruption,
Discerning the Holy Substitution!
Loneliness eternal possesses my spirit.
There is nothing that can be done;
I, now, unable to be won.

He is plotting my demise,
Oh you master of disguise!

I admit I have smoked,
Cracked like an egg and yoked;
Don’t we all sin?
I feel as though my soul was poked
By something which I can’t explain,
Only wondering if I can escape my vices,
Trespassed in life by enemies
Instituted and governed by a crisis—
Haunted by their own demons.
I have my own as well.
They had me choked
During my career, full of heathens
Which only the Holy One could dispel—
“I foreknew you in the womb.”
Did you know that I was a hopeless fool?
There’s nothing for us but doom.
Can I still be saved?
“Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.”
But I have left my watch in the sand!
Alas, indeed, I have caved.

He is plotting my demise,
Oh you master of disguise!

I was once a man of science;
Medical discoveries, which are bold—
God is cold,
So I’m told.
“Range all men in the world in rows.”
Shall I see them at the coves?
Will they all die in droves?
God only knows.
My lady with the panty-hose,
Can you give my clothes a fold?
Let me kiss you
As I am in defiance.
Ah yes, a rhapsody in blue!

A scandal in Bohemia
Once I saw—
Am I a victim of the Fall?
I am suffering with amnesia.
In the darkness, I am waiting,
John, my author, also fading.

In code corroborating Calvin’s creed,
I am nothing but a helpless fool
That will drown in his own folly:—
Salvation is lost, indeed.
Will you love me?
Allow my enemy to drool,
For him, I am dreadfully sorry.

Can I be freed
From the evil I have committed?
(They recommend I be admitted.)
The hours slid fast, as hours will,
“Those who seek shall have their fill.”
I’ll forever say that Apostle’s Creed
As I ride in Chaucer’s trolley.
Can I be saved again?

A solemn thing within the soul
To have nothing left but a clock,
Melting in an eternal wasteland….

I should have stayed a man of science—
Vanity is a grave misfortune.

What is crooked can’t be made straight,
And I met a crooked man
Who walked a crooked mile with a crooked pan.
I won’t see Saint Peter at the gate:
Only the souls who lost
Their salvation at a cost
For not repenting on their deathbeds.
Let me be your lover—
I am different undercover.
Can I walk in His Name blameless?
Is my life that shameless?
You see how I am wronged!

My offense is that I looked at you,
But how could you not blame me?
“You shall not commit adultery.”
So I sit and smoke my pipe
As John listens to my gripe
Leaving me to sit in a pew.
I have died already,
And I shall die again,
As commanded by Him on cue,
Recorded by a disciple’s hand.
Do you not have a clue
That I have an addiction to glue?

I once held the devil’s foot,
For I was summoned in the old days,
By those who longed for righteousness
In His Name’s sake;
All for a slice of cake!
Is life so cruel
That you won’t play pool,
Because you’re stuck in your ways?
My fate has been sealed,
As spoken by my enemies.
Indeed, I have kneeled,
But can’t be healed.

Are you ashamed I saw you naked?
The closet, it was occupied—
So my soul is vilified,
Since we all have free will,
A wicked plague, but necessary.
In solitude, I listen to Brahms
And his piano, which calms
Me as I read the Psalms.

Allow me to be resurrected—
Allow me to touch your frock
For the ship that enters the dock
Won’t be allowed to disembark—
Here, read the Gospel of Mark
Before it becomes dark.

You have forsaken me,
And all I ask is why?
Allow me to be whole,
As I am a fish trapped in a bowl.

Go now—leave me alone.
Don’t forget your hosiery.
I shall wallow in my misery.