Thread: Queen for a day

Clink and clank
I sometimes hear this in the morning
rather abstract noise
it could mean only
one thing
she's doing my dishes
not odd
she often does my dishes
or cleans things up
I'd thank her
if I really cared
she comes over often
her husband
is in some sort of business
though
I have never inquired
he leaves
she's alone
she knows I'm alone
all a matter of time

I hope she leaves
when the dishes are done

I've never really had enough heart
to tell her anything
a knock on the door
three knocks
followed by two
anyone who knows me
knows the door is never locked
I shuffle along and open anyway
looking,
there she is
like an inherent catastrophe
to a world
that doesn't notice

the routine is the same
cleaning, crying, talking, sex
she tells me
he's not away on business
he's with that hussy
she speaks knowing
I'm not really listening
just comfort in talking
then she complains about why I
don't hold her now
almost unbearable
but I know
what comes next

she likes it hot
she will turn on the heater
something about sweating
she said I think
I don't mind
the noise
our two sweaty bodies make is enjoyable
she will mover her head
back and forth rapidly
her long brown hair is always attacking me
when it's over
she goes to the bathroom
I'm pretty sure
she's getting herself off in there
I don't mind
by the time she comes out
I'm asleep
usually awoken
by clinks or sweeps or sometimes
she'll replace a light bulb

that was our routine
only this time
when I heard the last clank
I also heard plodding footsteps
coming towards
a kiss and a whisper
I'm filing for divorce
she leaves
I rollover and think
five minutes later
I get up
shamble to the door
fiddle with the knob
go back to bed

from now on
I lock my door.

This is smooth, easy and raises a few questions about relationships. I like the composition of the words used in this poem.


Did the 'queen for a day' share sexual intimacy with the narrator as a result of: (a) how nice the narrator must have been to her,
(b) a growing desire for revenge on her adulterous husband,
(c) a need to be sexually satisfied too.

I'm not so sure, but I guess option (a) echoes strongly the narrator's explanation.

I enjoyed this, Whitaker.

Whit, absolutely fantastic story telling. As Foxryder says, it runs very smoothly. And a perfect example fo "showing" not telling. I imagine you keep a poetry file as I do. Keep this on top of the heap! I have some points..

Clink and clank
I sometimes hear this in the morning
rather abstract noise
it could mean only
one thing
she's doing my dishes
not odd
she often does my dishes
or cleans things up
I'd thank her
if I really cared
she comes over often
her husband
is in some sort of business
though
I have never inquired
he leaves
she's alone
she knows I'm alone
all a matter of time

I hope she leaves
when the dishes are done

I've never really had enough heart
to tell her anything
a knock on the door
three knocks
followed by two
anyone who knows me
knows the door is never locked
I shuffle along and open anyway
looking,
there she is
like an "inherent catastrophe" too large words too close together for this poem.
to a world
that doesn't notice
the routine is the same
cleaning, crying, talking, sex
she tells me
he's not away on business
he's with that hussy
she speaks knowing
I'm not really listening
just comfort in talking
then she complains about why I
don't hold her now
almost unbearable
but I know
what comes next

she likes it hot
she will turn on the heater
something about sweating
she said I think
I don't mind
the noise
our two sweaty bodies make is enjoyable
she will mover her head "move" her head?
back and forth rapidly
her long brown hair is always attacking me not sure "attacking" goes
when it's over
she goes to the bathroom
I'm pretty sure
she's getting herself off in there
I don't mind
by the time she comes out
I'm asleep
usually awoken
by clinks or sweeps or sometimes
she'll replace a light bulb excellent detail!

that was our routine
only this time
when I heard the last clank
I also heard plodding footsteps
coming towards
a kiss and a whisper
I'm filing for divorce Really getting even more interesting now!
she leaves
I rollover and think
five minutes later
I get up
shamble to the door
fiddle with the knob
go back to bed

from now on
I lock my door. the perfect ending...

A thrououghly enjoyable read! Laurie