Thread: - THAI-AN (nộp cống/lời than van*) -

She, Bi`nh Di.u
He, Bao An
Now, Sue
Brian
in Love
with America
they spawn

I am there
in consciousness stream
theirs
for bean cake
for ginger
threads of rice
a sprouting of me
to offer atonement
beyond sorrow
and a smile...

Under the same sky
of Trang Bang
Manhattan bowels
&
My Lai
Florida palmsbeaches, na-palm
under the same fiendished, fiery sky
hope after...

In pious ethic
for Billy and John and Luke
ever
Chie^'n, Chinh, Cu`ong...
and perhaps, Phuong?

Thai-An
where I am wont
to Peace and gentle tender
yet crippled for thought
into these faces seen
10,000,000 agonies...

She, Bi`nh Di.u
He, Bao An
Now, Sue
Brian
Now
in Love
with America?

Thai-An windbells
her Green Corridor
bamboo sans
bungees & bombs
& still no Exit
for my ache,
a Morld cambode unwell
Laos & unclear...

H.e.m./HaroHalola
3.20.MMix.
(lời rên rỉ)
*(Tribute/Lament)

I found this to be very touching, although I must admit that I didn't understand all that you were saying here. I do believe that I understood the spirit behind it though. Much enjoyed, and will be back to read again.

Haro, this is a very exotic poem which I liked very much, especially the imagery. A few favorites:

for bean cake
for ginger
threads of rice
a sprouting of me
to offer atonement
beyond sorrow
and a smile...

And I liked your use of alliteration, here.

Thai-An windbells
her Green Corridor
bamboo sans
bungees & bombs

As Cindy mentioned, you could flesh out the meaning a bit. But you've got some good things going on here.

Hello Gumby - I fancy meeting with you, here; TY, as always, for the attention to my Work; well, if you understood "all", I would conscript you for Vietnamese language lessons - lol. Absolutely, by saying you've grasped the Poem's "spirit" ("touching") implies you have; I welcome another visit to this piece, & again an exchange of comments & ideas - H.e.m./H'H.

SilverMoon - TY for the attention to my Work; in this particular piece, It was essential to magnify the portrayal through imagery & alliteration, which you have aptly quoted. The Poem attempts to survey the debacle of the past & Its current juxtaposition employing the metaphor of those "repatriated" to the source, & due to It, assimilating/capitalizing, as such; notwithstanding the narrator's issues of (attempted) rectifying & reconciling the perpetrated horrors. "Exotic" is a humbling description. "Cindy?" Please continue to read my Work (here & elsewhere), I am pleased to respond, in kind - H.e.m./H'H.

Haro, I did get your idea of "repatriated" in the following. Wish I had included that in my reply. You're a pleasure to read and look forward to more! Laurie

Now, Sue
Brian
in Love
with America
they spawn

And your repeating it twice fell in just the right places.

Despite a bit of a language barrier, the meaning of this piece comes shining through and is quite moving. Like Laurie, I dug the alliteration. I am very interested in and saddened by the desire of today's youth to become Americanized because they lose touch with their roots and so much of the beauty of culture is lost. And even though I didn't understand every single phrase, this piece captures that brilliantly. Enjoyed to the extreme and moved beyond mere words. Excellent work.

Laurie/SM - Well, if you had included your perception in the 1st. reply, there would have been small need for the follow? Again, TY for the approbation, It is always a joy to read/hear readers are appreciating my attempts at communication in verse. Yes, an aspect of sage Poeting/Poetry is cognizance of effective repetition, i.e., emphasis which further brings the reader, hence the message into strong focus; what might be comparable (in an oblique way) from the days of expository writing's "central idea/topic sentence." Btw, as a former South Shore musician, witnessed a share of silver Moons out Oak Beach way in the 70's; always the yen for Glen Head/Old Brookville, family had contentment from Valley Stream>Babylon - lol. You are welcome to read (accessible in abundance) my Work at www.poetryinbaltimore.com & www.arcanum.com; It would be only appropriate to post here in increments. I don't believe Ambiance Artists (http://<i>http://wwwartandsole.smffo.../index.php</i>) allows non-members the view (perhaps you are a member? H.e.m./H'H.

Harlo, I will definetely check out your links and look forward to reading more of your work. I used to live in Valley Stream! Then further up to Massapequa Park and now in Port Jefferson, right near the sound. Pleased to meet a fellow Long Islander!

Hello, ChestersDaughter - Well, here I am a neophyte "1" threader to your 900+, & of course this will (eventually) equal-out based-on 3-per-day for 3 yrs., if you remain stationary. This said, TY for responding in a quality manner to my attempt to quality Work, in particular this piece resurrecting history, with currency. Of course, I had no expectations (echoed by posters) the language alone would suffice, so the text was redoubled (a motif I often employ when explication is required) in a effort to further the readers' comprehension/enjoyment, i.e., "I get It." Sort-of the Poem defining Itself as It travels to the denouement. "...the meaning of this piece comes shining through and is quite moving." This affirms, & TY. The juxtaposition of the characters' "Americanization" (indubitably) with old-culture mores is interesting to observe; moreover, they are here because of our "adventure," seeking a better place, opportunity, survival as the Poem depicts...in essence, a situation (per force) turned onto Its head. Of course, the bittersweet irony (& this is the subject of a Poem I have been nursing-without-composing longer than anticipated) is the "assimilation" is in the cradle of the enemy. I am reading Rodger Kamenetz's The Jew In The Lotus which attempts, successfully, I believe, to juxtapose the Diasporas of the Jews &, the comparatively recent Tibetans at the death hands of the Chinese. The comparisons are strikingly similar, coupled with the Dalai Lama's struggle to maintain religious fervor in a rapidly changing environ, the "new" Tibetans in India who are "militant" & new World eager. Our Iraqi "adventure" has decimated a 3,000 yr. culture by 1st. (by design) destroying the antiquity...& so It goes.

Your comments for my Work are most gracious, nothing "mere" about your words. I hope you will continue to read my Work & freely comment; I have referenced other venues, for now, you might advantage. H.e.m./H'H.

SilverMoon - Typo or a portmanteau of HaroHalola ("Harlo")? Valley Stream!? Pray tell where?, before the move "further up" (the economic scale, or just further "out?"); yes, ol' Port Jeff, sounds' very good! Also pleased to meet you, however L.I. is my memory, I now reside by quite different waters, in S. Fla., & perhaps to become even more different waters (aqua-turquoise>pitch) if the tide brings the black, unctuous death from the Gulf. I look forward to your future reading & comments re: my Work...here, there, & everywhere - H.e.m./H'H.

Sorry for the misspell, "Haro"! Florida sounds good. Have visited my uncle in Clearwater where the Gulf is just beautiful. Clear blue waters. But there's nothing like the waters in Nigril, Jamaica!!!

SilverMoon - "misspell, G*dspell, coldspell..." ought be the basis for a children's game, like Ring 'Round The Spelling Bee. Fla., like any locale has Its assets & liabilities, weather the thing immediately to mind; I have been to Clearwater, hence, as you have noted, the "water." However, in the dark of the creeping goo, may soon assume the mantle of (perversely) Nigril (dark); although, I have been enamored of various Jamaica places (not the Queens, where homeless heroes die ignominiously on the street, though in the other Jamaica, Kingston ain't where ya wanna be, either; musician/cruise ship friends learned, the hard way), I have not yet visited, Jamaican acquaintances have espoused the Island's incredible beauty - do you know of "Lover's Leap", St. Elizabeth Parish? I recall the Hamptons as lovely & deserted, though the water color is not, of course, tropical, & cold, as were the waves one insane March years ago when we were crazed to surf! That was at Pt. Lookout. Back to reading/writing, perhaps another post - H'H.

Missed the spots you mentioned but was based in Montego Bay (where natives of the land try to suck the visitors dry of money in what I would suppose you could call, flea markets.)

Enjoyed climbing Dunn's River Falls near Ocho Rios. But I'm a chicken so we employed a guide as I wanted to reach the top without it being the death of me. Really, the makings of a poem I should get to.

Back to reading/writing, perhaps another post -

Are we talking about you, me or for the overall good - the both of us?

I just posted "Yaritza" if you're interested in reading. It was inspired by a Brazlian CD I was listening that morning of the writing. Then my imagination went on a visit!

Wow, Haro, that was some reply, so much for this tiny mind to digest. Truly appreciate your time and for providing me with future fodder for the cerebral furnace. I'll be checking out the work you cited as soon as time permits. For the record, I don't pay any mind to post counts, I let others' words speak for themselves, and yours are mighty powerful. Both you and your work have intrigued me greatly, so please be assured I'll be keeping an eye out for your future offerings.

Best,
Lisa