Language. Sex. Violence. Other? - Writers Forum

youdontknowme · 07-25-2007, 10:04 AM

Many of my friends have made utterly foolish mistakes.

I have friends that have long since decided to get into the dating game - today, all that remains of their folly is a trail of tears and broken hearts. I have friends who have lost their virginity. I have friends addicted to porn. I have friends who have dabbled with drugs. I have friends who smoke in secret. I have friends who rebel for the sake of rebelling. I have friends who cruise through life without a paddle. I have friends who lie and cuss to get some approval. I have friends who believed suicide really was the final solution. I have friends who deal with the throes of teenage angst and in a manner that can only be described as juvenile and naïve.

Most, if not all of them, struggle with feelings of alienation and loneliness - just like every other pimply, teenage kid out there. They're fickle, irresponsible, volatile, self-absorbed, and completely at the mercy of their emotions. They're plagued with their insecurities. It colours everything they do. They curse the heavens above and the people around them. The fault lies within everyone else except themselves. Youth is, indeed, wasted on the young.

Yes, I have nothing but contempt for teenagers in general and these particular friends of mine have done little to change my mind. It's somewhat ironic, I know, since I'm a teenager myself. People used to tell my parents: oh, just you wait until Ethan becomes a teenager, just you wait! My parents would laugh nervously and glance at me every now and then to make sure I wasn't about to explode. I suppose I did go through an awkward phase, albeit very briefly. But that was it. It was a phase that passed all too quickly. Others have been trapped in that same awkward phase for years. Some never get out of it.

Yet here I am, well into my seventeenth year, and my teenage years have largely been mellow and undramatic compared to those of my friends'. Unlike any teenager you'd care to talk to these days, overall, I'm very happy with myself. I know my strengths and my weakness. I know who I am and I know my place in the world. I know where I am and I know where I'm going. I have a heightened sense of self-awareness that some would call arrogance, but I disagree: don't mistake the ability to live with one's own demons as a mark of pride.

People tell me I can find fault in everyone except myself. That isn't true, I'd reply, I'm more than aware of my own faults, which is exactly why I can see theirs. It takes one to know one. I never had the restlessness and primal drive to "find myself," which is so typical of teenagers. Perhaps I'm overdue. Perhaps. But I think it's because I've skipped the boring part. I found myself a long time ago.

I am comfortable in my own skin.

I'm not so sure as to why that is, however. Maybe it's because I've been homeschooled. In any case, recently, a series of events have made me realize that I'm surrounded by friends grappling with all sorts of problems. I don't try to help them because ultimately, the problem lies within themselves. No amount of lectures or scoldings will change a person. They know what they've done. They don't need someone else to tell them again. In a roundabout way, I'm helping them by not helping. I don't care because I care. No one can help you live with yourself, dammit.

The world is a cold, hard, uncompromising place and if you sorry bunch of adolescents think that there's always going to be a shoulder to cry on or a sympathetic ear to listen to your troubles, think again. You don't deserve a thing. None of us do. The sooner you realize that the better. It's rather harsh to tell people pick themselves up off the floor. But that's just the way it is. You made a choice to do this, that, or this and that. You made a choice to rebel. Trite or not, you always have a choice.

Damn extenuating circumstances. The blame is on your own shoulders. No one else. If you think your "personal decisions" affect you and you alone, you're wrong. You're so wrong. Every choice you've ever made affects not only you but every single person around you. Remember this life is not your own. There are consequences. If not in this life, then in the next. God be with us all.

whiteplague2007 · 07-25-2007, 10:49 AM

youdontknowme, very interesting on us, "Teenagers." And I agree with everything you said! My teenage years have been pretty mellow myself (me also being seventeen). I never put myself in that "peer pressure point," of doing drugs, or going to wild parties, or dressing a certain way, or drinking, or having sex, etc... I've always tried to be myself, and please my parent. I try not to whine (which I rarely/almost to he point of never, do) about my own faults. And I KNOW who I'am. Not in "future wise," but Who I'am in general. An artist, a writer, a bookwurm, a nice friend, a caring person... etc...etc...etc... Yeah you get the point. And I see it all the time around me. Teenagers doing silly things, not knowing exackly what to do, still relying on parent's when they screw up (excuse my french, but I think it should be applied here). All the immature "teens," out there just always make me a little bit more than ticked. Because I'm consider very mature for my age group, and I went through some pretty rough and bumpy, heart-wenching times when I was younger. I don't know if I should be specific on that or not, of exackly what happened to me. And it always makes me angry to see kids dishing there parent's, just because they care for there children's well being, and how they rebel and start doing wild, stupid things. I only live with my two brother's and my dad, so it can be a little rough sometimes too.
Anyway! Liked what you say.

Jam · 08-13-2007, 08:51 PM

I agree in certain circumstances but I also have to say that "you don't care to show you care" is a completely ridiculous sentence that I don't beleive in at all. Infact, it's cynical people like you that allow a chain of misery to keep expanding onto people that are upset about their lives, thus ending in terrible results like suicide. I do agree however in the way that too many teens are phonies when it comes to depression (I see depression as your main theme here, if it isn't sorry), which really does screw people who seriously are sick and are being ignored by people like you.

You should always care about people, whether you like them or you don't. You should always be there too listen too people because when a time comes and it gets hard for you, I wouldn't be suprised if nobody gave two shits about you (even though you claim you can live with your own demons). It's also great that you've found yourself, but at the same time, it isn't fair for you too mock people who are still looking.

This is all my opinion of course, so I don't care if you don't want to listen to me rant about the inate goodness of humankind I beleive we all possess, but when you think about it, you're just as cynical about life as those people claiming they're depressed all the time about their lives.

Oh and by the way, yeah it was because you were homeschooled. Not sure if you've ever faced a day of highschool, but yeah, it can be nerve wracking and filled with anxiety.

I hope this doesn't come across as a flame, just more of a discussion if anything, and I really do think that you're quite a talented writer.

Keep up good work