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My dear boy;
You can’t even guess, but now I know for surethat we both are lucky: we were born under the wing of the guardian angel. I don’twant to say that we are some super humans or marked by God, but right now,after those horrible events in Japan, this fact seems so real for me.
Long time ago, nearly half a century back, onthe New Years Eve, as well as on their wedding night your grandparents hadconceived me. There are no doubts on the date of my conception, because thedate of my birth is September 30th. All my life I have felt privilegesof a love child. My parents not only conceived me in love, but gave that loveto me, taught how to use it and give to others. The guardian angel had touched myspawn life by its wing on that night…
Twenty years later it’s touched me and yourfather, when the probability of your conception practically was zero, but,nevertheless, your life had spawned exactly that day. In three months the fateof your life was in the hands of doctors, who didn’t believe that you werestill alive in my womb. There was no modern equipment, such as Sonogram machines,and they suggested that you shouldn’t have been born and gave me a week for mydecision. Our guardian angel gave me a hint about its existence: I had refusedto believe in whatever they theoretically suggested; I listened to my body andbegan to feel the presence of super force then. It was my first experience ofthe contact with God. It was on the level of intuition, absolutely strange tome, but something told me that you were alive and that you were You – my onlychild and a boy.
At one grim morning, to my great surprise, theyloaded me to some old van, which use to work as an ambulance on those days, anddrove to other city, where the brand new Sonogram machine was tested. It hadheard the beats of your little heart: that was what saved you and your life forthe first time from your conception… I had known then that it was the first,but not the last ordeal in your life, the test of survival. The guardian angeldid its best for you to be born.
You were born and even screamed like all newbornsdid, but suddenly stopped crying and went blue. I couldn’t understand what wasgoing on there, because the doctors took you away to the other room and revivedyou there. Our guardian angel whispered into my ear then that everything wouldbe all right, that you were my tough boy; I completely trusted it and not fornothing…
In fifteen years after that day you were atthe edge of your life again, when you crashed on your skateboard. The concussionwouldn’t be such a big problem to go through, but the danger was in a littlesplinter of the base of your scalp, which ripped into your brain; I was leftonly with the hopes for whatever the next morning would have brought: you couldgo blind, lose your mind or simply not survive it. I believe that there is a liveconnection between us and, probably, because of that I was awakened by thetelephone call at three o’clock in the morning: it was an absurd coincidence,but it seemed that the guardian angel called me to help you, when you wentthrough the crisis of your life. It was him, who returned that splinter back toyour scalp, glued it to the base, so you would come back to me.
You have always been a very enduring boy: rememberhow we drove you from Ocracoke Island with appendix pains for twelve hours, youwere lying in the back of the car and didn’t complain? We had brought you to thathospital in New York, and they left you waiting there for another twelve hourstill their doctor woke up. The guardian angel was protecting you during all thosetwenty four hours, giving some strength to endure the pain, not letting theperitonitis to burst inside you until they took you to the surgery. All I coulddo then, only hold your cold hand and believe in its presence.
And when September 11 had happened, you gottrapped in the very epicenter of those events, on the top floor of your school,against your will facing the horrible tragedy. You saw how poor people werejumping from the windows of the first twin building, holding hands andplummeting towards their deaths. I was seven miles away from you, without anyhint on your whereabouts. The whole morning I was running from one floor to another,from watching unfolding horror live events on TV to my phone in hope to get aword from you. A lot of people from all over the world had called me then, but Icouldn’t tell them anything about you.
You were led out from the school only whenyour building started to shake in unison with the falling “twin”. It was yourfirst experience of a real earthquake, but, unfortunately, not the last…
You left the building…and got hit by thatcloud of dust, which was rising from the place of a fallen giant. Then you hadto stay in a long line to the pay phone, so you could call me and tell that youwere alive. That morning I looked and behaved like a zombie, which was talkingto himself. But, in fact, I was talking with your guardian angel; he simplydidn’t have a right to abandon you, while I was begging him for help!
That day left its mark on you. You hadstopped talking, kept locking up in your room, read something for hours andcommunicated with your friends by Internet. I think that you became much olderthat month, while your school was closed, and you had to go through all theaftermath of that tragedy…
I don’t know how to name it: a rock or an ironyof fate, some circumstances or your life mission in this world, but I almostphysically feel the presence of our guardian angel. Ten years later after that tragedyin New York you are finding yourself in the middle of a scary catastrophe inTokyo, right in the heart of its epicenter. I am going through the same ordeal ofnot knowing about your whereabouts for half a day again, like on that morningof September 11, but strong assurance that you are alive and safe is notleaving me. I just know that my love is protecting you together with theguardian angel.
Probably, you and I are destined to pass thetests for survival all the time, and God sends us His guardian angel to make iteasier.
You have no idea, how huge was my relieve andhow endless my happiness, when I saw your message that you were alive and safe!Of course, anyone would have felt what I did, being in my situation, but whatwas the most important for me that you have sent it to me almost right away,after the earthquake had started: it’s just by coincidence that I have receivedit half a day later. Remember, when I visited you in Tokyo, I said that thelove of mother is always a revival force, and only it will help you in thescary moment? Is not it true?
You are, no doubt, a grown and independentguy, but for me you always will be a beloved child; and it is great that mylove is necessary to you!
In my perception, God and Love are the same;so may this God-Love send you Its guardian angel during all your life, while Iwill try to make sure that the help is delivered on time to you!
Your Mother.
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