The last part of my creative Non-fiction...
Fire Walking
That afternoon, I drove over to Castle Bay Country Club in Hampstead where the event was taking place. Rows of brand new tan colored houses lined the entrance road to the club house restaurant. The golf course, windswept and brown from the cold weather of winter, still had golfers dotting its green. Once inside the castle-esque club house, I helped Key set out the awards. The administrators from two of the other offices made sure the agents signed appropriate safety forms while Aggie took pictures and I prepared to run the slideshow for our guest motivational speaker, Dave Tuscany.
Dave was the owner of a seminar company out of Michigan called Thru the Fire, LLC. He was a short animated man who once studied under famed fire walker Tolly Burkan and now traveled the country giving motivational speeches. He was a big believer in mind over matter: Life is not as scary as one perceives. By pushing yourself past your limits, you can become a stronger, more confident person (His motto being, “Yes, you can!”). He began his seminar by speaking about how one perceives fears in life as compared to the truth. He shared statistics and had the agents share their own fears with one another. He also spoke about how he pushed himself past his own fears and limitations to become a stronger person. He rode in a jet fighter, learned to fire walk, and walk on glass (which he demonstrated in front of us all). Then, the seminar got really interesting.
It was time for the real estate agents to face some of their own fears by taking part in some seemingly dangerous, but controlled activities. The first included placing boards between two chairs and breaking them with the forearm. Three agents were chosen from the audience and allowed to try. Dave instructed each agent on how to cup their hand and where the board should meet their arm. If they were to hit the board with just their hand, they would break their hand. One female agent in the lineup rocked back and forth on her feet. There was hesitation in her aged face, like she expected to bruise her arm before she broke any board. But when she stepped up to the board and broke it in one karate chop, she jumped excitedly and everyone clapped.
The board breaking was mild compared to what Dave had planned next. Little known to most people, the soft spot below a person’s throat in between the collar bones is a tough spot. Dave demonstrated this by breaking a blunt-tip arrow in half by placing it between that spot and a board, and slowly adding pressure. He invited three more agents and staff to come to the front to try. Wearing safety goggles, all three volunteers broke the arrows. But that was not pushing limits enough. Employing the same soft spot, he invited six volunteers to come to the front to try bending a long piece of steel rebar! Audience members were not as quick to volunteer for this activity, but after some coaxing Dave got six very uncertain agents to come to the front. Expectedly, this activity took the longest. Two partners stood opposite of each other with one end of the bar placed against the soft spot under their throat. Moving slowly closer to each other, they would bend the bar between them. Impeded by the fear they would puncture their throat or their partner’s, it took each team a couple tries to do it. One even sat down unable to do it, but after they saw the other two finally succeed they got up and tried it again. Eventually, all three teams were successful.
Each of these exercises were intended to get the audience fired up for the big finale – fire walking! But first Dave had to advise the audience about the risks of walking on fire and precautionary measures all should take, including walking across the fire and not running. He warned us that the fire would be 1,300 degrees Fahrenheit! Engine blocks for cars are made by pouring molten metal at 1,100 degrees Fahrenheit! Most participants would get hot spots on the soles of their feet and only a small percentage (around 2%) would get burned. Soaking the feet as soon as we arrived home would help the hot spots and putting pressure at the back of the knees for five minutes before bed would improve the healing of the spots. Additionally, he warned against putting anything oily on the spots. If we followed his directions, by morning they would be gone. It was at this time I started to feel nervous. Running his slideshow, I was sitting just feet away from him and the closeness seemed to intensify what he was saying. My hands got cold and started sweating. My feet got cold. I felt a little light headed and I started to shake. I crossed my arms so no one would see.
Dave had already informed us the fire had been burning in the parking lot for an hour and a half in order to achieve the best temperature. He wanted everyone to take off their socks and shoes even if they had already chosen not to walk. Sometimes when people see others doing the walking they suddenly feel energized and want to do it themselves. Since it is a quick process, he wanted everyone to prepare to do it so last minute walkers would not hold up the process.
He wanted everyone to get into a focused mind frame, so there were two rules:
1. Everyone was to have respect for each other and be quiet walking to the fire as to allow their peers to think about what they were doing.
2. No one was to feel pressure to do it, so there was no asking each other if they were going to walk.
Quickly, everyone took off their shoes and rolled up their pant legs.
I could hear the padding of everyone’s feet as we quietly walked to the parking lot where there was a 4’ high stack of brightly burning wood. As I got closer, I noticed a layer of sod about 4’ wide by 10’ long laid out on the parking lot with the fire, our only light, right in the middle. The group formed a line around the sod and Dave prepared to spread out the coals. He explained that a specific kind of wood, Cedar, was used and to use any other kind might raise the likelihood of being burned. He and an assistant raked out the pile of wood moving chunks to the edge to create a level walking area of about 7’. Then, he patted it all down to create a shield of protection between the feet and the fire. Finally, he used a digital thermometer to measure the heat of the fire. It was 1,500 degrees F, slightly hire than normal, but still within the safety range (people have walked on fires as hot as 2,200 degrees F).
To show us the proper way of walking across fire and to test the heat, Dave did a trial walk. He began by telling us to have an affirmation in mind and to repeat it verbally or mentally as we walked across the fire. Standing at the right end of the fire, he centered himself mentally. Then, he walked quickly and stiff legged across the fire while yelling, “Yes, I can!” Returning to the beginning, he told everyone to create a line behind him. He would lead the walk and the next person would follow as soon as the first was off the fire. Behind Dave stood Martin, Key, a few agents, and Aggie, who originally proclaimed she was not doing it. I was in the middle of the long line. Non-participants, less than a third of the group, stood on the side and watched.
Dave began the walk. Martin followed behind and Key followed him yelling, “Yes! Yes! Yes!” Before I knew it, it was my turn. From where I stood, the fire did not look very long. Others were taking it in four or five steps. I did not think about how much shorter I was than everyone else there.
My affirmation was, “I can do this!” I know, not very original, but it was the most appropriate at the time. Two beats after I saw the agent in front of me step off the fire, I was on it. I still remember my exact thoughts:
I can do this!
It’s not hot.
Not too hot.
Okay, it’s hot.
Shit! My foot rolled!
Just at the end, I stepped on a chunk and my right foot rolled into the fire. I was trying not to verbally swear as I hobbled off the fire, but no one seemed to notice. They were too caught up in cheering on their friends. But my foot cooled off seconds later and I was fine enough to cheer on Aggie as she went across a second time.
After everyone had gone, we all walked back up the hill to the restaurant. On the patio were tubs of water and washcloths for cleaning the soot off our feet. Even after I washed my feet, there was still soot, but we all returned to our seats and Dave did his closing speech. I tried to pay attention, but I could only will him to hurry up. My feet, now in shoes, were beginning to burn and I still had to drive back to Wilmington. Luckily, Key did not need me for clean-up, because I limped all the way to my car.
The drive home was torture. The pain in both my feet became increasingly worse. My right foot, the one I rolled in the fire, felt like I was still stepping on the coals. I kept switching feet on the gas pedal to relieve the pain and I talked myself through the drive as tears began to form at the corner of my eyes.
My mother, who was watching television waiting for my return, was super helpful when I arrived. As soon as she saw my condition, she got a tub of water to soak my feet in. That helped only a little bit. My feet were sore and forming blisters (I had seven on my right foot). I tried putting pressure on the area behind my knees, but that affected the pain only a few minutes and probably just because I was cutting off circulation. So, I put burn salve all over my feet and elevated them. That eased some of the pain, but I was still very uncomfortable. My only other solution was grabbing the bottle of wine out of the fridge and drinking that, which turned out to be a fantastic idea! It greatly eased the pain. As the alcohol settled in, I called Key and my broker-in-charge to let them know I was not going to be at work the next day.
Of course, I chose this as the best time to talk to my mother about the dog I saw online. I told her where she could see his video and she agreed to look. She was always willing to take things into consideration, but I think the image of me lying on the floor, my feet lubed with burn salve and ground-in soot, and a bottle of wine in one hand helped to soften her to the idea of a new dog. She sent an e-mail to the woman who had posted the video and they arranged for us to see him the next day.
Once the whole bottle of wine took full-effect, I slept the whole night through. When I woke in the morning, I could barely walk, but the pain was minimal when I was off my feet. That afternoon, mother and I climbed in the car and drove over an hour to the Whiteville animal shelter. As I limped into the county shelter, I tried not to look at the other animals. I accidentally glanced at a cage as we passed. The mutt inside was shaking like crazy. I don’t know if it was fear or because it was sick. I was overjoyed when we finally got to the one I was wanting. He was a handsome dog with a mainly tan coat, white chest, and speckled feet. He approached me cautiously, but once he sniffed my and my mother’s hands he was willing to go with us. His welcoming attitude made me decide to take him home.
He didn't have a name, so on the car ride home I tried names on him. He reacted best to Buddy and that is what I chose to call him (later on I would add “Barefoot” – Buddy Barefoot). He was scared and it's obvious someone hit him, but he was an absolute sweetheart. The first night was very entertaining. I kept waking up to him finding his reflection in appliances and picture frames. I was covering up everything, because he was trying to play with himself. He was clearly still a puppy.
The next night, he started vomiting. My mother thought it was nerves or Buddy getting used to new food. The next day she took him to the vet to get his shots and to have him looked over. That is when we learned he had the Parvo Virus, a fatal condition if not treated early. Luckily, he was in the early stages. If he did not get treated at the veterinary hospital, he would die in a few days from dehydration, but his treatment would take at least $700 dollars – money I did not have. As soon as I found out, I began crying. My luck had not been good lately and I had already grown attached to him. I left work early, and went straight to the bank to try and get a loan. I was turned down. I had just bought a house and the mortgage sent my debt to income ratio out of line. So, mom and I gathered up anything we thought we could pawn. We sold jewelry, including my school ring and my grandfather’s rings, and antique swords. We were able to come up with the majority of the money. After a week, Buddy was healed and it was the best sacrifice I had ever made. He has brought more joy to my and my mother’s life than anything we pawned.
As for the fire walking, out of 50-60 people, I was the only one who got burned. Do I regret doing it? No, not one bit. Like other times in my life, I faced a fear, overcame it, and was reminded that life is a string of obstacles.