Woops! I misread your feedback on F.E. I see now that you meant going into classical "scene" structure would slow down the writing style too much. I'm glad you think that because I kind of like the "let loose" tell all voice.. but don't tell anybody! "Show, don't tell!" writers will throw eggs at me.
Thanks so much for your help!
Congratulations o'empurpled one!
Congrats on the mentor!
Damn, I was hoping you had the secret of life sorted. Oh well, maybe I'll try the Ox.
Ta for the flyby note. I'm not sure about adhd, it seems I'm trying to squeeze at least three lifetimes into one span.
I always dreamed of a slow, slippers by the fire old age, now I feel like Alice on the conveyor. And some bugger keeps turning it up another notch when I'm not looking.
Mmm.. Body Farms! My favorite!
I remember seeing a documentary about one, how they studied decomposition in order to use the data to help with forensics. I thought, "Well, when it's lunch time do the workers actually have an appetite? Do they get desensitized to it like workers in PotatoChip factories get desensitized to potato chips?"
"You know, Jim, ever since I started working here, I lost my appetite for human flesh. I mean, it's all we see, every day, all day. Now, even if I'm hungry, the last thing I want to eat is a human body. It's just like, I'm sick of it, you know? It totally ruined my enjoyment of cannibalism."
Jim finishes licking his fingers before saying, "Mmm! Not me!"
.. lol sorry, that was really gross. I'm in a silly mood today. Enjoyed your LM entry, YabaGaba!
Thanks so much for judging this last round. I know it's a ton of work. We are all very grateful.
You picked out one section of my story--describing the irony of selling homes while the MC himself was so unsettled.... Thanks for that! I had no idea it was even in there! (...and here I thought I had such control over my message....!)
I've been enjoying peeking over yourshoulder as you write. Keep at it!
Thanks for reading my story and for picking up my error - I read your 'nit' about ten times before I figured out what was wrong with the sentence. haha - good thing you read it! Thanks again.