Song - Candle Light - Page 2 - Writers Forum

Damian_Rucci · 02-09-2008, 03:06 PM

I like it it flows well and is quite deep

thamior · 02-09-2008, 07:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Damian_Rucci

I like it it flows well and is quite deep

Positive comment! *pumps ego*

But, honestly, thanks. Anything specific that made you like it, or anything specific that you think needs changing?

I'm not against nit picking, but I'd rather have specifics. Like "such and such a word really works against blah blah, using things like x and y could help". Otherwise, how am I going to see it? I didn't see it before...

Damian_Rucci · 02-09-2008, 07:44 PM

I liked how you use the candles throughout the verses that was nice and also how you use imagery, yet you don't emphasize it too much. Like there isn't too much imagery to make it hard to comprehend

thamior · 02-09-2008, 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Damian_Rucci

I liked how you use the candles throughout the verses that was nice and also how you use imagery, yet you don't emphasize it too much. Like there isn't too much imagery to make it hard to comprehend

Thanks. I'm working on another, a bit stuck so I'm going to put it down for awhile.

Damian_Rucci · 02-09-2008, 07:48 PM

Oh alright I'll check it out when you post it

Mystery · 02-09-2008, 08:05 PM

Dude, I picked out 3-4 specific examples, I'm not going to nitpick your entire piece so you can take a point.