Pulling The Dredge - Writers Forum

eriq1220 · 01-12-2008, 08:28 PM

Well, I wrote this some time ago, but since I am new here, I figured I'd post it. Like a lot of my songs, the timing sounds right in my head, but it is a bit hard to get on paper. Anyways, here ya go!

Rain falling for days,
My world now flooded
Tears for all..Made clear of the way
Draining my soul, My mind is busted

I try and I try, So hard and so long
Taken back down, wasted and gone
tried to build the foundation, making my way
Pulling up soot, pulling the dredge

Sins that were buried
they were just playing dead
Sorrows made to rest
They were brought out to play
I'm dying again
pulling the dredge

The currents are strong, breaking me down
My life is tormented, The courage has drowned
Their will was so wrong, killing us all
Sadness laid to rest, I buried them all

I try and I try, So hard and so long
Taken back down, wasted and gone
tried to build the foundation, making my way
Pulling up soot, pulling the dredge

Sins that were buried
they were just playing dead
Sorrows that I laid to rest
They were brought out to play
I'm dying again
pulling the dredge

The anchor I made, digging the ground
Stirring the souls, stirring the sound
Piling up bodies, building the damn
Breaking the rules, making us damned

I try and I try, So hard and so long
Taken back down, wasted and gone
tried to build the foundation, making my way
Digging up soot
Pulling the dredge

Sins that were buried
they were just playing dead
Sorrows made to rest
They were brought out to play
I'm dying again
Pulling the dredge

kaytea111 · 01-13-2008, 10:51 AM

man, this song rocks,
it has a really nice flow
and i love how the rhyming is just there.

and the lyrics are really deep, pretty relatable.
luv it

Crash_Tomas · 01-13-2008, 02:37 PM

i read kaytea's comment quick and thought she said, "this song sucks" I was like: "are you crazy? this was awesome!" then I read it again and realized she said it rocks, which it does. and now I agree with her.

Great Job~

Scripto_ergo_anhelo · 01-14-2008, 12:52 AM

i like this song a lot. it's cool, reading lyrics with no idea of what the music might have sounded like in the writer's head, because it gives the reader so much freedom to make it sound however they imagine it.

and i imagined it as awesome.

eriq1220 · 01-14-2008, 09:21 AM

Thanks for the comments everyone. It is much appreciated!

vet_tech3 · 01-17-2008, 10:34 AM

I love it! Very nice flow and I definately feel the lyrics.

Mystery · 01-21-2008, 07:55 AM

I don't like it, and I'll tell you why.

Theres too much of you mixed with too much of somebody else, a lot of the things I read, small bits and pieces everywhere, are cliche. Now I know what a lot of people are going to say, its a song yadda yadda its okay to use things and so on, how are you going to string certain words differently bla bla bla.

It's not just that, it's the theme, it's the feel, it's everything. If you listen to a band like opeth, they aren't saying anything new, it's the feel and timbre of their lyricism and their style that makes it unique, and I don't get the impression that your lyrics have that effect.