Olly Buckle

Note:- to "Have a little bubble" is Scottish slang for weeping a bit, but you knew that.

Briefly she drew apart
The curtains round her heart
Burst and had a little bubble
As she thought about the trouble
Then she was alright again
Said it was a girlie thing
Briefly she drew apart
The curtains round her heart

Briefly she drew apart
The curtains round her heart
But 'cause things that drive her mad
Make up the life she's always had
It's part of her art
To keep the curtains round her heart

Pull yourself together and see sense
You can't waste life in sad laments
Your back with what you lost again
Try to think of what you gain
Practice your art
And keep the curtains round your heart

Briefly she drew apart
The curtains round her heart
Let slip what's inside
The side she always hides
But now at last and forever
For him she draws together
The curtains round her heart

Now she's sharing their blood secrets with the woman down the hall
Because he won't talk to her and she can't not talk at all
But now nothing is unspoken
And the curtains are wide open.

I have thought about writing it in the first person female, Briefly I drew apart etc but keeping the third verse as a male voice, pull yourself together and see sense. I prefer it like this, it is ambiguous, it could be someone elses words or could be she is telling hersef not to go with her heart but to listen to what others say, but songs tend to be in the first person. Any comments please.

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kaytea111

i like it.

Olly Buckle

Thank you kaytea111, what was it about it that you liked?

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kaytea111

y'kno, I really dont know why I like it. Maybe because I can relate a little...I'm not sure. I just kno that I like it. Good job Olly!

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Olly Buckle

This was a while ago, has no-one any further comment?

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T.W. North

Considering it was a while ago, that'd be why no-one has commented recently. And sometimes things just don't get anything said on them. Seriously, the amount of things I've had ignored in the past. Anyway, I have no real opinion on this, thats probably why I never commented. However, you repeat the whole line about curtains round her heart way too much. And the rhyming could do a little work...it's very forced.

Mystery

Just one thing Ill point out, the first verse ending and beginning of the chorus/next verse clash horribly because of the repetition. You'd need 15-20 seconds of interlude to cover that.

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Let's drown all our sorrows and we'll be gone till tomorrow...

Dies Irae, Dies Ilia, Solvet Saeclum In Favilla...

Yes, must still shut up.