smoking_pot_is_norml

The Plunge

Wander Onward
Never Looking back
Even for the fact
That I'll be alone

Tears of fear
Dripping cleary
Drowning my story
Making a darker tone

Let the breath
Exhale Slower
Next breath in
Hold it forever

And Plunge
Off into Nothing
And plunge
Ignoring safety
Destination
Unknownst to me
But sometimes
A Plunge is all I need

Afraid of fate
Where time takes me
Momentarily
Paralyzed

Slumber is peace
Or so they say
I've never laid
So immobilized

Let the breath
Exhale slower
Next Breath in
Hold it forever
Take one step
Into air
Throw caution away
Become unaware

(chorus)

This is not a cry for help
Nor an excuse for the hell
I put you through
This is what I need
To finally find peace
And construe
Myself
(repeat 2)

(chorus)

__________________
Freedom lies
In a state of mind
That can only rely
On its self
~S.P.I.N

mandax

I'm going to be honest and say that I didn't think I was going to like this, but then I read it and really enjoyed it. Usually I'm not too fond of such short phrases and stanzas, but this was very good. The topic is borderline cliche, but I think you managed to stay original enough.

Oh, if you want more critiques, you should probably critique other peoples' lyrics. They'll be more inclined to critique yours. =D