You Could Be the Ingrid Bergman to My Humphrey Bogart - Writers Forum

Gnomes Amok · 06-27-2006, 08:05 AM

Two notes: The title is a Casablanca reference, and this is another one that is sung in an odd way so I realize the flow appears choppy in parts. Hope you guys like it
__________________________________________________ __________

(Verse 1)
Either the sidewalk was paved with mud
On the way home from your door
Or the way I left was weighing on my mind
Making every step forward I took forced

Because each time I lifted one of my shoes
To put it in down in front of the other
I felt it sinking into the ground as if to say
If you leave now you leave love behind forever

(Chorus)
If I could just take
A moment of your time
To look inside your head
And understand your mind

Id bring a pen and paper
And take prodigious notes
On the words you want to hear
The words I wish I'd spoke

(Verse 2)
Cause like a child I think second chances
Come with every mistake we make
The truth is some words cant be taken back
Thats a reality of life I learned much to late

Its the hardest one to accept some nights
When my old car's passenger seat
Is vacant and the steady hum of the radio's
The only break in the silence between

Myself and me

(Bridge)
Its immeasurably amazing
How when into your eyes Im gazing
I see everything in life Im missing

Staring right back at me

There's no way to describe
How it feels lost in those eyes
Waiting and hoping you'll realize

I can be what you need

(Chorus)
If I could just take
A moment of your time
To look inside your head
And understand your mind

I would write a song
Based on what I found
And then I'd sing it to you
And you'd slowly turn around.

(Outro)
But in the event that that were possible
Id have psychic powers,
So I could just join the X-Men.
My super-hero alias would Wrecking Ball

Cause Id have super strength and what not.

Bika · 06-27-2006, 08:04 PM

ahhhhh yes, this one is good. took a few reads to get into it (flow IS a touch choppy) but it works, and works well.

Last line is classic

Gnomes Amok · 06-29-2006, 09:17 AM

Thanks for takin the time, Bika, I appreciate the positive comments

Buuuuut I added another verse and some lines at the end because it wasnt quite as long as the song required, and I didnt get much feedback before this bump so Im hoping some more people will comment and the lack of interest wasnt a reflection of the quality

Thats the worst when a song is so bad no one wants to talk about it, haha

aliceedelweiss · 06-29-2006, 09:47 AM

I had to read it, I'm a totaly Humphry fan. I didn't see much of the refrence to Casablanca. I kind of did but....It's not too obvious. It was written pretty good and was funny, even if it was choppy but you said that was due to the music. I was thinking you'd Mention Humphrey and Ingrid in the song but you didn't :-/ either way I liked it! nice job.

Alice

Gnomes Amok · 06-29-2006, 10:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aliceedelweiss

I had to read it, I'm a totaly Humphry fan. I didn't see much of the refrence to Casablanca. I kind of did but....It's not too obvious. It was written pretty good and was funny, even if it was choppy but you said that was due to the music. I was thinking you'd Mention Humphrey and Ingrid in the song but you didn't :-/ either way I liked it! nice job.

Alice

You know, the only reference to Casablanca is in the title (it refers to the way Ilsa left Rick Blaine in the plot of the movie) but it hadnt even occured to me to write a song directly relating to the movie. Thats an excellent idea, Im gonna do just that. Thanks for the inspiration haha. Im gonna change the title and save this one for another song.

The praise is very appreciated, btw

nae411 · 06-29-2006, 11:37 AM

Agree with you about the title change, I too was looking for the reference as well. I'd love to hear it put to music. If you get it uploaded somewhere post a link, ok?

Nice job.
Nae