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Lyrics Original Song Lyrics.

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Old 01-20-2005, 08:32 PM   #1
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23
commander221
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Hypocrite

I wrote this pretty short simple song. Hope you like it.

“Hypocrite”
For so long you made him pay
You weren’t who you said
You don’t do what you say
You don’t say what you do

All my time, you think about a dime
If you were rich, you act like the poor
All my time I wonder in the shine
Even if it came down, you act like it was up…yeah~~~

Half a year must pass before you get it in you head
All that does is make me half dead
So you waste away time, and you don’t really care
It’s not you fault cause you can’t even see as you move throught the air

(Chorus)
I say, if you were a ghost
You’d say you were real
You are my hypocrite…Yeah…Yeah
So I ask do you understand
You say you are better and it just doesn’t matter
You are my hypocrite…Yeah…Yeah
If you died alone, you surely would say it
You tell the people what they would want to hear
And you no nothing of that crying fear
You are my hypocrite!!!…Yeah…Yeah
O’ you are my hypocrite!!!…Yeah…Yeah

This is holy blood, Holy Grail
This is water
And this is wine
All because this is taking from time

Ya know how to role them good old dice
(Singer solo)
But it doesn’t run in the family
So just be kind cause ya sure don’t know me
You filthy two-timer of a filthy disease!!!

Cause you are a hypocrite
You say what you don’t mean
You are who you aren’t
You one big floating dream~~~

(Chorus)
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Old 01-26-2005, 01:45 AM   #2
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Gracie
I think it is really cool! Do you have any music to put it to? Do you know any musicians lol?

Grace
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Old 01-28-2005, 04:29 AM   #3
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I think its a great idea and a great start but some work needs to be done to it. For one your rhymes you could have been much better, and less seemingly forced, there are plenty of great words to use to spruce up your song, let it rhyme, flow and get accross your meaning. Also in the begining you say him and then you say me, I dont get that and if its intentional you may want some way of explaining it more in the song. otherwise I think its fine, look at it a little bit and try to make some changes and you could have a great song.
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