Thread: Homegrown Truth

(The verses are sung in a whisper with guitar, chorus is supposed to be distorted and loud)

I just want you to know I am not the crazy one
I see what they want nobody to see
I hear what has been suppressed by our TV’s
They talk to me, they feed me static,
Artificially-sweetened bullshit carcinogens
The radio fuzz is growing softer
Immune systems built off of Wonder Bread
But I am not the crazy one, I perceive what has been lost
Threatened into submission

Feed me more chemicals
Chemicals
I don’t see where the debacle is
Debacle
Can you taste it?
Tip of your tongue
Sour, then sweet, a cancer candy

I need you to know that they -
That they tell me what I want to believe
The truth is what my local access television feeds
Feeds to me
I will not bite this bait, I will not accept lies
But when it’s coated in agent orange, it blinds my eyes
What if there is no God, I’m standing at the Gates
Only a veil with a man working the machine
No one’s there but me
But me!

Feed me more chemicals
Chemicals
I don’t see where the debacle is
Debacle
Can you taste it?
Tip of your tongue
Sour, then sweet, a cancer candy

With a booming industry
A flourishing society
There cannot be a blemish upon the face of perfection
I am the blemish, the aggressor
Check the expiration date on a tainted election
How long until the flames of a Molotov
Ignite our most sacred laws?

Feed me more chemicals
Chemicals
I don’t see where the debacle is
Debacle
Can you taste it?
Tip of your tongue
Sour, then sweet, a cancer candy
Sour, then sweet
Sour, then sweet
The truth is there, right on your TV
Sour, then sweet
Sour, then sweet
I think I’ll take another bite.

I would cut the title down to just "Homegrown"... gives it a bit of mystery.. I like the over all concept of the piece.. .. Some of the word choices suggest they would be more spoken than sung at least to me they sound that way.... It feels very dramatic.. nearly theatrical am I wrong??

Fondly,
Miriam

There are a lot of words in there, for example compare,

I just want you to know I am not the crazy one
I see what they want nobody to see
I hear what has been suppressed by our TV’s
with
Know I am not the crazy one
What they don't want me to I see
I hear what is not on our TV

Keep things simple, that second line of yours could easily lose it's meaning in the music. if you need the line length it might be better to repeat what you have said or reiterate it in another form, music enhances things but also competes for the attention.

^I'm going to have to disagree with that, the lines are fine with the amount of words they have in them. The extra words you got rid of add a different, and creepier meaning to it all.

And I feel this may be a little inspired by Porcupine Tree?

Actually it was more inspired by System of a Down, but I will listen to that, so thanks for the comparison

Yes, Marshall, I suppose it was written fairly theatrically, thank you for noting it.. I also do recognize what you mean about the title. May change that.

Thanks for the suggestions, Buckle, but as Marshall said, it was written to be very soft and theatrical, almost just spoken with notes behind it, verrry quietly. The beat is so slow that I feel each syllable is important to the timing and meaning.

I see your point, the particular music can change everything, thankyou for your civil response.

Yes I do quite agree - sometimes I read lyrics for a song and think 'Wow, that would never work', but some artists have a way to create a tempo and melody that maintains a good-enough flow to make the lyrics work. Unfortunately, I am only a decent composer in my head! I suppose that is why I merely WRITE lyrics, haha.

And I try my best to keep it civil - they are just words, no reason to become antsy. Thank you for taking the time to review it!