Originally Posted by thethingsthatpeoplewilldo.blogspot.com

Man dies after getting it on with a horse.

Last month, when the news about 45 year-old man from (edited out) who died while trying to get it on with a horse, like most people, simply assumed that his fatal injuries were the result of being kicked in the head by his unwilling equestrian 'partner'.

But instead, the actual cause of death was even more disturbing (but much funnier). An autopsy revealed that the sick little pervert had actually died from internal bleeding caused by a perforated colon. Yes folks, this twisted individual will go down in history as the first person to be ***-f'ed to death by a horse! (His family must be so proud of him!)

Investigators first learned of the incident after the man was admitted to (edited out) Community Hospital on July 2 and died shortly afterwards. The county Medical Examiner's Office ruled that the death was accidental and the result of getting it on with a horse. (Maybe the hoof prints on his back might have given the game away).

But the story kept on getting stranger. Firstly, this doesn't appear to have been an isolated incident. Preliminary investigations by King County sheriff's detectives discovered that the farm in (edited out), where the bizarre sexual encounter took place, was a hot topic of discussion in Internet chat rooms as a "destination" spot for people looking to get it on with animals.

Police and local vets then inspected the chickens, goats and sheep on the property to determine whether they too had been victimized. Although no definite proof emerged that sex was forced on these smaller, weaker animals, a police spokesman told reporters that he had seen several of the chickens "walking a bit funny".

Secondly, the man's family, (who not surprisingly, wished to remain anonymous), told reporters that they were shocked by the news and were amazed when told that their father had purchased the thoroughbred stallion earlier in the year, apparently one of a pair he kept at the farm. (We can't wait to hear what they decide to put on his headstone -"Loving husband - Caring Father - Animal Lover & Horse f'er" )

But the strangest detail of all was yet to come. Apparently, police discovered that the man had actually made a video tape of the whole perverted encounter.

Now the guys here at the (edited out) are pretty open-minded when it comes to sex, (so long as its between consenting adults of the human species), but why the hell would anyone want to tape themselves having sex with a horse?

Was he afraid that being ------- by a ---- the size of baseball bat attached to a bucking bronco wouldn't be a memorable-enough experience?

"Hey George. Remember that time you got effed by that horse?"

"No actually, I can't say that I do. Could you pass me that video tape so I can refresh my memory?"

And how does one begin to get into this whole "being effed by a horse" fetish? Does one have to start off with a Donkey or something and work up?

Originally Posted by Malone

The horse did it to him. How do you train a horse to ass fuck you? How would that even work? He'd have to devise a special table or something for him to bend over and the horse to get his hooves up on. And since horse cock is roughly the size of a small baseball bat, I really don't know how he kept the horse patient while he worked it inside him.
Ug.

Reminds me of Deadwood.

Originally Posted by A-L

Seriously though, there had to be some point in having sex with a horse. I mean it couldn't have been for sexual pleasure, with a horses dick being about the size of my leg, it would probably stab him in the heart. I just don't see the point.

Originally Posted by Writ-with-Hand

Horse cock is bigger than that. When I was out at sea in the military, one of the jarheads got a tape sent to him of women having sex with animals. One was with a horse. Biggest cottdam dick I've ever seen in my life. She jerked the horse's massive cock off with two hand. I don't want to tell you how much those things can ejaculate.