The Backward OX

Recently I had to contact the Communications Ombudsman with a complaint about my ISP. Our C.O. is a part of a Federal Government department.

So at first I wasn’t really surprised when I received a phone call from someone purporting to work for a well-known market researcher, asking if I’d be willing to participate in a five-to-seven-minute phone survey about my experience in dealing with the Ombudsman. I said yes and away we went. It all sounded genuine and reassuring.

But after I got off the phone I got to thinking. Many of the phrases meant to reassure me were identical with those used by the scammers about whom we are warned all the time. For example, “You may call my employer to check up on me”. 99.9% of people hearing that are going to say “No, that’s ok, I believe you”.

I wasn’t asked any questions that could have resulted in anyone getting into my financial records. But I was asked questions which on reflection were damn stupid in context but which would help telemarketers seeking to target a particular segment of potential buyers. For example, age, occupation, occupation of head of household. They were mixed in amongst innocuous questions so you don’t think about them. Sheeesh, I’m stupid. The more I thought about this afterwards the more I’m convinced. Since when did a government department give a continental about the welfare of its customers?

I believe that what may have happened is that a bot has hacked into that department’s records and extracted names and phone numbers, then a human has taken this list, phoned, and asked all the right questions to create buyer profiles. Those profiles can then be sold to telemarketers.

There’s two things I’m going to do. Tomorrow I’ll phone the Ombudsman to find out if they are having any market research carried out. (And I’ll warn them, if they say no) And regardless of what I learn, in future all phone calls I receive from people I don’t know will be terminated immediately. F*ck market research.

__________________

Modest Me

I always just hang up the phone or say no if someone asks me to take a survey.
I also hang up on telemarketers- I hate those people.

It hurts me to think that there are innocent, nice, old people out there who lose their whole savings because they can't say no to telemarketers. :,(
My grandmother was one of them.
Telemarketers know when they get ahold of someone like that, so they keep calling and calling til they bleed the person dry..

*ahem* sorry for the rant

__________________
Warning: Will talk about religion at the drop of a hat.

** http://theoddvillepress.com/ **

Malone

You've got too much time on your hands.

__________________
There Is A Policeman Inside All Our Heads: He Must Be Destroyed

The Backward OX

At least time is less messy than what you probably have on your hand.

__________________

papertears

MM, I get really annoyed too. I used to do things like take the phone in the loo and stick the microphone down into the toilet and flush it before hanging up. However someone pointed out to me that more and more states making laws that if a telemarketer (depends on what state, and the state's definition of telemarketing) calls you and you specifically tell them to remove you from their list (the language might need to be stated in some semantical form) they are obligated to remove you.

I know this is a crapshoot and it may not apply to your area. In CO it does apply under certain circumstances. So back when I had a land line, I would always interrupt the telemarketers and state very clearly that I wish to be removed from their list. This was while I was recovering from a broken foot and had some spare time so I'd note the time of the call, the CID if there was one and the name of the person. Some of them dared to call back and CO had at that time a web page you could submit this information to. If the solicitors called back and offended more than twice I got a couple of checks, one for $50 and one for $200. I used those to dump the land line, get a better cell phone, VOIP and still had enough for a massage. Of course, I gave this up when my foot healed and I no longer had all that spare time.

I don't know if some states are still using no-call lists. My dad worries me that he's going to get in trouble for losing his cool and cursing at them. So I not only showed him how to call the 1-800-opt-out or whatever the number is for credit related offers. Unfortunately this cuts down more on snail mail than phone calls, but it helps some. I also almost have him talked into getting VOIP, because since I've had it, I haven't gotten a single telemarketer call.

It is much cheaper than a land line. I have a mobile phone that I can reroute my calls to if for some reason my power goes out, by calling the VOIP company and giving a password. I also don't get any telemarketing calls on the cell phone. Also, with VOIP I pay $15/month and get unlimited long distance to the US/Canada/Mexico and for $5 more I could add the UK and IRL. I have never had a problem with 911, which due to the fire problems we had a few years ago in my area, I was concerned about. My former land line was "digital" according to Comca$t, it came in through my cable and and it sounded like everyone was in the bathroom. My VOIP is very clear, even at peak times, while I used to game in high rez, and when I'd download huge files.

I think you can even find free software to use VOIP. But $15 a month with no contracts was cheap enough for me, especially the long distance fees. (Just my land line alone was something like $39/month.) I'm sounding like a commercial now, but for $5 dollars a month I can add a virtual number in the same prefix as my friends/family that can't afford long distance rates and they can call me as if it were local for them. As a bonus, the router that came free with the signup is a great hardware firewall, very easily configurable.

__________________

Malone

How could you have known that my dog's cock was particularly slimy tonight? That's amazing!

__________________
There Is A Policeman Inside All Our Heads: He Must Be Destroyed

The Backward OX

I'm starting to understand Velo's sig:

Are you kidding Velo? Even Malone won't touch this one
-adrianhayter

__________________

The Backward OX

I'm presently working on two rather rude scripts designed to take the offensive to telemarketers. When I'm satisfied, I'll be rehearsing them until I have them memorised perfectly and can make them sound conversational. Then I shall enjoy receiving calls from them.

"'Will you come into my parlour?', said the spider to the fly".

Does that work like a 1-800 number?

__________________

papertears

It works like they're calling me locally, no long distance fees. I just pay an additional $5 per virtual number a month.

I've never had a 1-800 number, only 1-900 numbers...

__________________

Remedy

If it was a legitimate research call, they may have just been trying to get demographics for further usage.

I'm on the do-not-call list, which is actually kind of depressing, because it prevents me from playing around with them. I still get random calls - would you like to donate to this or that? - but not nearly as many, and I try not to screw around with charities.

I remember back in my college search days when I got a call from Georgetown University. By that point, I was all ready sure of where I wanted to go, so when they asked me if I wanted to attend their college, I said no. And yet they wanted me to take their survey anyway. I still said no. Then, they sent me mail about their college (just in case I hadn't said no enough) and another survey. They never did get an answer.

Ty_lol

I got scammed one time into buying lots of magazines over the phone. The called night and day trying to suck more and more out of you. Finally my mom talked to them, told them I was only 16 and what they did was illegal, then told them to fuck off. Thanks mom.

valeca

[rant]Here's a different perspective for those who get calls from legit telemarketers (not all of them are scams):

I've worked as a telemarketer; not because I wanted to, but because circumstances put me in a position where I badly needed work due to having young bellies to fill and there being nothing else available.

I don't know why it is, but people seem to think it's funny to be an asshole to the person making the call. They think they're being clever.

If you wouldn't behave this way to your co-workers, your boss, your friends, the person bagging your groceries, the average person on the street asking you a question, why the fuck would you think it's fine to do it over the phone? Is it really so far beyond your ability to simply say, "No thank you."?

For those who do this: Does it really make you feel that great to know that you're yet another in a long line of assholes who've dumped crap onto the person on the other end of the line? Does it make you feel good knowing that, at the end of the day, you've added a little more jerkiness to someone else's already crappy job? And why the hell are you fucking proud of yourself for being an asshole?

I think it's truly pathetic that some think this is a perfectly acceptable way to behave. Oddly enough, I see these same people whining about others being rude to them!

The next time a telemarketer calls and you act like a complete prick, stop and think about who's the bigger fucktard. The next time someone is an asshat to you, remind yourself that you too are, in fact, an asshat.[/rant]

Ox, I think it's a reasonable course of action to call and ask whether or not they're conducting a survey. If they are, fine. If they're not, then they can make an attempt to put a stop to it.

__________________
"...make your own nature, not the advice of others, your guide in life." --Pythia, Oracle of Apollo at Delphi

I'm here.

Remedy

The phone gives one anonymity, and it depersonifies the person at the other end. It's no more than blind courage. Although, really, I've been known to be rude to people in outside life too, but I'm not like most people.

I always say "no, thank you" the first time, and usually the second time as well. It's when they continue to persist (or if they get nasty; I've had a few do that) that I stop trying to be polite.

JosephB

Ha ha. I had ACL surgery one summer and had to quit my grocery store job. I took a job in a boiler room selling mags over the phone. This lady called me a crook etc. so I went off script and said, I'm sorry ma'am. I just have to do this etc, etc. I know it's a bad deal.

I didn't know they were listening -- I got fired on the spot.

__________________
"The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources."
-- Albert Einstein

"I am really only interested in a fiction of miracles."
-- Flannery O'Connor

The Backward OX

Ha ha. That's funny. About fifteen years ago I had recurring knee pain, the doc sent me off to see the orthopaedic surgeon, the orthopod told me what they could do by way of exploratory surgery, then went on to tell me all the ghastly things that could go wrong with the operation, from simple infection to death. The pain magically vanished and has never returned. Psychosomatic medicine.

__________________