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08-21-2007, 09:08 AM
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#1
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Feel like Hell...
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,103
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Divine intervention? Um.. no thanks
I'm currently in the hospital (minor thing) and wanted something to eat last night. It was getting late, and I knew the store in the lobby would close soon. I prayed to any god who would listen it would still be open, and reached the elevators. They were located on floor 6, 6 and... 6. Even better, I juuuust missed the store. Divine intervention? No thanks! 
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Tomorrow is a mystery, yesterday is history, today is a gift That's why it's called the present
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08-21-2007, 06:40 PM
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#2
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Fernando Poo
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,433
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Sometimes God's answer is "no."
God probably knew you wanted to pick up a copy of Maxim and then touch yourself in ways that displease him.
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"Mother Hitton's Littul Kittons wait for you down there. Little pets they are, little little little pets. Cute little things, they say. Don't you believe it. No man ever saw them and walked away alive. You won't either. That's the final dash, flash. That's the utter clobber, cobber." --Cordwainer Smith, Norstrillia.
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08-21-2007, 07:34 PM
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#3
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Scribe
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Suburbia
Gender: Male
Posts: 58
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"And on the fifth day, God said, "Don't ask me for Twinkies past nine."
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Fusion Central
Threads: 16,719, Posts: 162,911, Members: 1,185
Sports, political, philosophical, music, literature, and movie discussions
A forum where it all comes together
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08-21-2007, 07:35 PM
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#4
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Profound Writer
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,464
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Couldn´t you have phoned for a pizza?
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08-21-2007, 07:49 PM
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#5
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Fernando Poo
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,433
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The problem is probably that you cast your prayer out to "any God."
God feels cheap and used when you treat him like a slut. That was nothing more than an attempt at a divine booty call.
Commitment first, twinkies after.
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"Mother Hitton's Littul Kittons wait for you down there. Little pets they are, little little little pets. Cute little things, they say. Don't you believe it. No man ever saw them and walked away alive. You won't either. That's the final dash, flash. That's the utter clobber, cobber." --Cordwainer Smith, Norstrillia.
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08-21-2007, 08:48 PM
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#6
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Prolific Writer
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: The Edge Of Society and Brink of Insanity
Gender: Male
Posts: 429
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Nicely put.
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-Xtlk - My Hopeful Book!
A shattered daimond does not mend,
Yet pieces of glass are fused again.
The purest hearts are the ones that break,
The guarded and stained are the ones that remain.
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08-22-2007, 08:55 AM
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#7
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Feel like Hell...
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,103
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Ah, but I prayed to any god because that God haven't listened to me at all as long as I can remember, and I remember a lot.  Either way, the point was it seemed a god did listen. And which god uses the number 666? I'm no sure I want that one to interfere... 
__________________
Tomorrow is a mystery, yesterday is history, today is a gift That's why it's called the present
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08-22-2007, 09:19 AM
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#8
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Writing Machine
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Malaysia, if you dunno where that is, Pm me
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,898
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zombie
"And on the fifth day, God said, "Don't ask me for Twinkies past nine."
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That had me rolling with laughter. Good one mate. |
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08-22-2007, 11:26 PM
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#9
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Melbourne Australia
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,065
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These situations are what vending machines are made for.
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'Beauty stands and waits with gravity to start her death-defying leap. And he, a little charleychaplin man, who may or may not catch her fair eternal form spreadeagled in the empty air of existence.' - Laurence Felinghetti, 'The Acrobat'
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