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| Literary Maneuvers "Fortnightly" write-offs, competition, feedback 'n' fun. |
09-26-2006, 12:35 AM
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#16
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Mentor
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: cape cod, USA
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,814
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Any one can, in fact everyone is welcome.
Even judges, but only for fun (drats, I would score myself rather highly, I'm sure)
Here is my non-entry link for those who don't make it over to WW,
http://writingforums.com/showthread....597#post771597
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09-26-2006, 12:44 AM
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#17
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Banned
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 10
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Okay then. Here is my entry. I have only been working on it since last night when I first saw it and I hope it is okay...
Bluemen (486 words)
Do I dare? Indeed I do. I dare write this.
Is this what it means to feel? Indeed it is.
I didn’t take my pill. In fact, I threw the entire bottle out of the window this morning. That probably wasn’t the best idea. I’m sure that the Bluemen will find it soon. It will only be a matter of time until they’re here.
Until then, though, I am alive. Until then, I can see everything in its vibrant glory, the way that oh-so-ancient figure God intended it to be. I think I’m the only one that knows about “God” anymore. I have a “Bible” hidden under my bed.
I’m sure the Bluemen will find that as well.
If I’m already condemned, there’s no harm in refusing to conceal my evidence.
I’ve read a lot of books, most of them stolen from the underground cities.
(No one’s supposed to know about the whole world underground, underneath the cool gray ground that they tell us is natural. It’s just a case of finding the seams and pulling, ever so gently. There is a whole world down there. The world that existed before, the world that existed when men truly ruled themselves and the planet. I’m telling you know that they exist! They exist!)
They say that there used to be these silly things called “trials” where everyone would get up and shout and eventually a “judge” would say that the criminal was either condemned or “innocent”.
But I’m not supposed to know about that. The Bluemen wouldn’t like that at all.
I sit here. They will be here soon.
I breathe. The air has never tasted so good as it fills my lungs.
She had stopped taking the pills weeks before. She had been careful.
But, as always, the Bluemen had caught her. They disappeared her within a day.
The Bluemen are very efficient controllers.
This, I do all of this, for her. For what she believed in. For what she lived for. And what she died for.
I do this for the freedom of man! To no longer be subjected to “slavery” from the Bluemen!
They claim that they were here first, and that us, a non-sentient species, was raised to sentience through their benevolence.
I know the truth. They are not of this world.
I am going to seal this missive and leave it outside, in the bushes. Too likely, the Bluemen will find it.
But if you, reader, find it, know the truth!
You are a man. This is your planet.
Throw away your pills, they dull your senses. Visit the underground world. There are freemen there. Men who have never tasted the slavery of the Bluemen. Let them teach you. Read their books. Understand who you are.
And then rise up, rise up, and take up the mantle of humanity!
True Men we once were, and men we shall one day be again!
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09-27-2006, 05:22 PM
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#18
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Adept Writer
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Michigan
Gender: Female
Posts: 880
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Here's my stab at it.
Of Life and Time...437 words
http://writingforums.com/showthread.php?t=66378
you have to scroll down a little...
__________________
"If you live to be one hundred, I want to live to be one hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you." ~Winnie the Pooh~
www.literarymary.com
Last edited by murdershewrote2005 : 09-27-2006 at 11:56 PM.
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09-27-2006, 07:53 PM
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#19
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Fergus, Ontario CA
Posts: 2,660
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Selorian would like to keep the LM Entries thread separate from the other Workshop threads. He's placed a sticky thread for it in the Workshop. Would everyone who's posted over there be so kind as to copy your entry into this topmost thread. Any questions, PM or email me. Thanks.
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09-28-2006, 12:56 AM
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#20
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Scribe
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 94
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Random obeservation, I got a comment that my story was another bleak future. I wonder if anybody thinks it would be worth writing about the future if it wasn't to warn against mistakes we are making now. I guess it would just make it a work of fantasy. I welcome any other musings...
...or not
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09-28-2006, 05:41 PM
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#21
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Profound Writer
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Antonio, TX
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,164
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Drop
Here's my entry:
Drop(by the way, I'm winging it, sooo don't expect perfection)
I saw nothing but darkness. Standing alone on what I thought was a ledge, my hands gripped the sticky tar of the wall. I worked my way along the edge of the cliff, feeling for vibrations, heat, anything that might signal the bardarian troupe.
We had fought the troupe three times last night, or at least, what we thought was last night. One could never tell anymore; the sun no longer existed. I stopped. slow vibrations crept up along the coolness of the wall. The emerging heat made me tremble, as it was only then that I could feel just how truly cold it was.
I bent down and searched the crags for an opening. I must have been covered in tar, not that it mattered. Suddenly, the rock gave way and I collapsed to the inside wall. One would expect a fire, or a torch, or anything to give that blessed light, yet once in side all I could see was the swallowing, searing, darkness.
But it was a start. Warm air brushed against my skin; I could tell the volcano was active. Scurrying down the cave, I fit my body in tight, going deeper and deeper, feeling for the signs of the troupe. I found it--pressed up against my back.
"Don't move." Came a voice. The accent was... unfamiliar.
"Who are you?" I asked.
"Nothing of your concern," the voice cackled, "I see you're native to this region. You don't find many of your kind, not since the seas evaporated." His voice was cold and raspy, something sinister.
"Don't kill me. Please, if this is your home, then I shall leave." I pleaded.
"No, no... No need for that. I haven't had anyone to work on since the war." I could hear the bristling of whiskers. "Indeed, the war that snuffed out the sun."
There was a crack, and my knees buckled under me. I dropped, never to to get up again.
:end:
I don't know how many words that is, but I have to get off now. You'll just have to judge me on this. Boy I hope fantasy of you competes.
-Cacafire
Last edited by cacafire : 09-28-2006 at 05:45 PM.
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09-30-2006, 04:48 PM
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#22
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,139
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Okay, well I wouldn't have entered, but I guess I have to now, since cacafire said he wouldn't gimme any. 500 words exactly!
:begin:
Hands work quickly. I pull his arm from the sleeve of the jacket, then the other; pull it out from under his back. It’s hard work, he’s deadweight. I put my own arms through the jacket, pull up the collar.
The wind reaches me, even in the shelter of the forest. It tears at my face like shards of glass. I’m glad I have the jacket. I finger through the pockets, they’re empty.
His boots are in good condition. I prise them from his feet, discard my own, slip them on. I pull the hat from his head, stare at the crimson stain upon it before slipping it over my ears.
I adjust my footing, kick the rock that bears the same crimson mark as the hat.
Something pokes at my scalp from in the hat, if feels like cardboard. There’s a voice, and another, and the slam of steps slow my mind.
‘He’s there!’
‘Who’s that?’
‘He’s gone.’
I’m gone, running, ducking, turning from branches and roots, and they whip, slap at my face, and the snow breaks and crunches under my feet. I don’t stop running, not until the trees are far behind me.
Then I stop, pant, sit.
The thing in my hat pokes again, and when my hand reaches up to pull it from my head, there’s a voice again. And I’m up, running, panting, and the snow breaks and crunches under my feet.
But I don’t stop, not on purpose. The weight in my shoulder forces me to the ground, the pain of it rips into my arm as I try to rise. I turn my head backwards, lying in the snow, see the shaft in my shoulder and figures coming closer.
Three of them.
‘He’s there.’
‘Nice shot.’
‘He’s gone…’
I was gone. Before I could even see faces, the rock comes at me. I see the crimson seal upon it, the same one I’d used. The irony.
The soldiers approach the body, pull his arms from the sleeves, pull it from his back. It's hard work, he's deadweight. They take his boots. One of them fingers the hat, pulls out the piece of cardboard.
‘What’s that?’
‘I don’t know.’ The soldier reads the words on the card: ‘ “I know not with what weapons World War three will be fought, but World War four will be fought with sticks and stones. Albert Einstein.” The guy wasn’t far off, whoever he was.’
They all grin, and the soldier flips the card over, begins to read to untidy words, but fails to read them aloud.
Time can heal nothing but false wounds; the real wound can never close, can never heal, for it is embedded so deeply with in the world of men, rooted so firmly within the instinct of each of us, that we can never change. We are a dark and destructive disease upon the world - a virus - and it pains me to realise that only our eradication will bring peace.
__________________
It's only natural to want something profound in your sig.
Last edited by Fantasy of You : 10-05-2006 at 11:37 AM.
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10-04-2006, 01:20 PM
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#23
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Best Seller
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Continent of Mu
Gender: Male
Posts: 665
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Here's mine. Cut it close. *gulp* 499 words, not including the title.
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Viviandetta
The crowd jeered from above the walls of junk surrounding the Pit. Broken equipment and fragments of glass littered the Pit's edge below. The two contestants facing each other waited for a tired sun to break from the acid-lined clouds and signal the battle.
Forgotten Gods, look kindly upon me.
Vivian leaned against the metal pole Father had salvaged from the ruins, long ago. Her fingers rested on a tiny switch. Bolts, screws, and rusted nails surrounded her feet. Her gray eyes narrowed at the enemy, who also wore the traditional dress for dueling: patches of plastic layered together. She pulled back her dirty, unwashed hair into a tight ponytail, and grinned blackened teeth at her man.
"Kill him," Father had said. "For your gender's honor--and your Mother's memory."
Vengeance would be hers today.
Weak shafts of auburn light broke past the clouds, and glass fragments glittered like crystals.
He spoke, and his voice rang up to the heavens. "I, Russum of Pillaged London, declare you foe and bound for the River of Thames!"
The enemy's shaved head gleamed in the sunlight, and he grinned too as he went into a defensive stance, sword held back, shield in front. The faded outline of ancient heraldry embossed its surface. Vivian knew it well, for her Mother's creed once belonged to the Red Cross. Mother. If only you could see me now.
"I am Vivian. I belong to no one, make no claim nor wish of destitution--except that you choke and die on your own blood!"
Russum broke into motion. Vivian only had a second to leap back before his sword smashed where she once stood. Low roars erupted from the spectators at the sudden burst of lightning striking the ground. Vivian blinked. So that's the secret of his weapon.
She balanced on her toes, careful not to step on any debris, and pointed the pole at his eyes. Russum snarled and rushed forward again. This time Vivian took the full brunt of his charge--
And fell flat on the ground with a hiss when a bolt embedded in her palm. Russum had used the shield to smash her and her pole aside. He lifted his sword for another lightning blow. Vivian rolled away from the stroke, ignoring the shrapnel piercing her body. She stood up quickly and backed off. Blood trickled from innumerable scratches and pooled on the dirt-packed floor.
One more time. Just one more time.
Confident his foe was shaken, Russum gave vent to a full throated warcry and stormed once more. Vivian took one step, smiled, and pressed the switch.
The magnetite rod heaved on invisible strings, and a shower of metal flew up and pierced Russum's unprotected back.
Russum staggered and fell to his knees. His mouth gaped open. Blood and foam bubbled up, and he dropped his weapons to clutch his throat where a serrated piece of metal speared his vocal chords.
"For my Mother, whom you killed."
Vivian raised her weapon.
" Die."
__________________

"The truth is in the song 'No one lives forever.'" ~ Balalaika
I am not of your faith, but if a god cannot recognize and reward such love and loyalty, how can he be a god?
If there are no dogs in heaven, let me rather go to wherever they are.
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10-04-2006, 08:34 PM
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#24
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Profound Writer
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Antonio, TX
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,164
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Off Topic:
I guess these stories show the attitude people have towards the future nowadays...  What ever happened to the future's of back to the future?
-Cacafire
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10-05-2006, 06:11 AM
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#25
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Addict
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: London
Posts: 193
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Sanctuary
“I don’t know…I’m just feeling a little…” says the girl.
“Yes, yes?”
“A little lonely, I guess.”
There is a sudden death-silence. The girl can almost feel the computer reeling with shock and disappointment.
The world goes wrong in moments. She can see the edge of the grassy field she stands in, golden waves of barley rippling without sound in the soft breeze. Birds are frozen in the sky, dripping polygons which moments before had been feathers. An old oak lies curled in the field, but she can see through to its core now, and it is hollow. The thick, tough bark of the trunk is nothing more than an illusion, paper-thin – the tree is hollow now.
“I’ve…tried, so hard, to keep you happy here.” The voice whispers straight into her soul, and the girl knows the computer would weep, if it could.
“Oh, but I love you, you know that.”
“I’ve tried to keep you happy and nothing I do…” The ground shakes, pulling up like a carpet on the horizon. The sunlight flickers through primary shades, and jagged edges are folding down from the clouds. Her world is dissolving.
“But it’s just…this place…it’s lonely.”
“You are the last one. You know that.”
A tear drops through the earth to virtual infinity.
“I know that.”
Last edited by Jiieden : 10-08-2006 at 02:58 PM.
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10-06-2006, 02:58 AM
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#26
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Writing Machine
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Lingering in doorways...
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,659
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Reflections of an Independent Nomenclature
Vast and endless, the once-known kingdom of the cosmos.
Ironic that we have taken those possibilities and destroyed them, placing ourselves into the confines of our new world, one that sets us free, and holds us completely.
It was almost three-hundred years ago, when mankind finally mapped the human psyche. In another ten years, we had the means to transfer this consciousness into insubstantial computerized space... a virtual plane of data bits and mathematical structure. At first attempt, immortality was a success, simply taking the essence from one body and moving it to the next. Illness, age, birth defect… all gone and irrelevant overnight. Later we realized that those bodies were only a hindrance, that remaining here was so infinitely better.
No longer did we fear for our physical health. Never again would we worship physical beauty. Hunger, pain, greed, intolerance; so many vices were given to dust in an instant that we almost did not find our way in the new humanity. The kingdoms of men, the borders of nations... all fell as one. War and hatred became distant memory, ideals of the past. Many railed against our departure, the most vocal were those that called themselves 'believers'. To think we once placed value in what those petty pretenders named God. Perhaps the greatest benefit of this existence is the assurance that we are our own, and that it has always been such. Sure there is still some debate amongst the Creative Philosophical nomenclatures as to where our existence truly began… but very little reference to a God being is found in those invigorating discussions.
You are data bits, and nothing more. Comforting, is it not?
Some semblances of our past selves remain, but are nothing compared to what we have achieved here, in this place. I move at the speed of thought. I comprehend all things that are known to any. My knowledge, my discoveries, my theories and insights are all given freely in the instant of their conception.
We inhabit physical forms only to maintain our existence, the mechanized recipients so easily constructed and assumed. Repairs to subsystems and backup systems are completed daily; we are never without a contingency system. We continue to propagate and multiply our numbers, but here it is done through code creation and careful assessment. And yes, a creator can still feel the same love for its creation as mothers and fathers once felt centuries ago. Here however, there are no limits to imagination and exploration. Our ‘children’ know everything that we know almost instantly. They are not only our equals, they are our betters, and we are so very pleased in that regard.
Oh yes, there is still emotion. It simply inhabits a different context. I'll never shed tears, or become so angry that I harm another. I can love, and I can become upset. The difference is understanding and acceptance. And here, we understand and accept all things.
Humanity has never been better.
Author's Note:
Lotta fun thinking about this one, appreciate the stretch Chris, great writes all.
Please excuse the slant on religion, just foreward thinking... write your own story.
//Sy (count: 493)
__________________
* Poems *
- Back for a bit, more and less.
Last edited by Syren : 10-06-2006 at 03:01 AM.
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10-11-2006, 03:16 AM
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#27
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Addict
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Nevada
Gender: Male
Posts: 196
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Milking the Vultures (302 words)
"It's time to milk the vultures," said Abraham. Everyone stood from their chairs. They walked to the door. "They're very hostile this time of season, so be careful." Everyone nodded. Abraham opened the door and each of them stepped into the cold, one after the other. Abraham walked to the front of the band, a hatchet in his left hand, and began the march into the desert night.
The moon was new. Their candles lit their way. In the distance, the vultures could be heard but could not be seen. The partially frozen dirt crunched beneath their feet.
As the band approached a stone altar, their pace began to thicken. When they reached the rock formation, Abraham stopped walking. The band formed a circle around him. From his long wool coat, Abraham removed two human femurs; he put one in each hand. He kneeled in front of the altar. As if it were a giant drum, he beat the bones against the rock. He began to speak in Latin.
All at once the vultures came. Their silhouettes could be seen against the stars above. The wind of their wings came down in a soft cool breeze. For a few long seconds, the kettle boiled above their heads, pacing and raving. Abraham's eyes, which had been shut, were now wide open and looking up. He dropped the bones and rose from his place before the altar.
A large vulture swooped down and drove it's hungry beak through his neck. It ripped out his throat as he lay helpless on his back. The band scattered, leaving their candles behind. The whole kettle of vultures flew down and attacked them, tore out their throats and their hearts. All the way through morning the vultures dined upon their bodies. They didn't spill a drop of milk.
__________________
"Just a perfect day / Drink sangria in the park / And then later, when it gets dark, we'll go home" Lou Reed, Perfect Day My Posted Writings
My Blog
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10-12-2006, 11:34 AM
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#28
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Profound Writer
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Antonio, TX
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,164
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Off Topic:
when is this going to be over?
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10-12-2006, 04:13 PM
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#29
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Fergus, Ontario CA
Posts: 2,660
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From original post:
Quote:
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The competition will close Jan. 1, 2507 at which time we’ll see whose was most accurate… Just kidding, but that’s the idea. Really it’ll close Sunday Oct. 15, 2006 and results posted within 7 days.
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10-13-2006, 01:10 AM
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#30
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Apr 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,358
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Ah nvm, sorry...
__________________
Every artist is a cannibal; Every poet is a thief All kill the inspiration; and sing about the grief - U2
Say what you mean, and mean what you say.
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