thamior

its not my passion? but my passion is psychology and it was something that was brought up, however I think the stereotype that cats are unloyal and that dogs are is very unfounded. Dogs tend to be more affectionate, but a cats "love" is just as "unconditional" as a dogs, but many animals have different personalities and so from cat to cat and dog to dog, responses and levels of affection are different. I think an animals preparedness to forgive stems from the lack of ability they have to store alot of things in long term memory, I still do not believe in the unconditional love of animals.

however we are bnow straying off topic so I'll end my part in it here.

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Dark and Shattered Lands

Thoth

that sounds accurate, at least for the women I've met.

Charlie_Eleanor

I agree...but it goes both ways. Guys always screw the slut if she will have them, over the good girl.

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Hodge

Retarded generalization + sexist comparison of chastity to "goodness" = your post is wrong.

Thoth

Some men ruin it for others. I prefer the shy girl next door type.

Charlie_Eleanor

This isn't the debate forum hodge. People dont have to back up their opinions with facts and reasoning.

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Charlie_Eleanor

If that is true you are just as rare as the girl who doesn't cheat, etc.

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Hodge

I retain the right to call out inaccurate statements anywhere I so choose, be it at work, in this section of the forum, or at a Nobel Prize award ceremony.

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Science

Charlie_Eleanor

I know, as do I.

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Thoth

also, it should be noted that there is a diff between being a nice guy and being a doormat.

Mermaid on the breakwater

Be yourself. I can talk to anybody you put me in the same room with. Believe me I can find a way. You go with the flow, if the girl wants the bad guy you say ok. If she says she wants you, you think about it. At the end of the day, who really cares? Only you can walk down the street, or wherever it is you walk, knowing that you're doing things right or whether you aren't. Chill out, don't panic so much, things work out in the wash.

Shawn

I'm going to have to buy you tickets, you know. Gore just needs to be brought down a notch.

As to the whole dating thing... guys can be real jerks. (So can women, but I'm a bit biased against guys.) It's kind of sad when you walk into a party, look around, and see the two people that are even remotely interested in co-mingling in something approximating a union of fidelity... then find out they're already dating.

So, if I'm looking for someone outside of a relationship, I usually go with assertive guys. Not because nice guys aren't nice, but because nice guys are usually taken or don't have the intention to; and consequently aren't experienced enough to "handle" me.

It may seem like everyone around you is hooking up, but it's really just your standard. The person you date doesn't have to have flawless skin, be a non-smoker, and enjoy reading the Sunday paper. Nice qualities to have, but totally unrealistic if you're looking for commitment.

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The most frightening part of leaving a parent's home, to me, is not knowing where one's own home is.

Wallmaker

I never understood this theory that nice guys always finish last. In fact, the "nice guys" who have told me this line have in fact... not been very nice guys. A little introspection is good, but suddenly this nice guy attitude also included a sense of entitlement.

Nice is so vague of a descriptor of someone's personality, I'm sure there are so many other determining factors. I don't mean you specifically, Zombie, since I don't know you, but what about compatibility? (this is the general 2nd person you, not Zombie) You could be the nicest person in the world, but if you don't have a connection, she may not be interested. What about attraction? I'm not saying guys should step out of a GQ magazine, but we all have things we like about the sex we're interested in. I for one love glasses and tall guys. I confess it, it's true! It doesn't mean I'm not going to like someone for being different than that, but I might go for one guy over the other if I'm more attracted to him.
Why do girls go for assholes? Hrrm... my sister has a particular love for more "difficult men" but I also know some men who love women that are "bitches." The are attracted to them for it, it intrigues them. Maybe it makes them feel special to melt that bitch or asshole's heart... until it gets broken. But again, I'm going to put this up with attractions. Some people like dating assholes. Maybe they even like the drama or attention of dating an assholes, maybe subconciously they don't realize it. Who knows? I should ask my sister what's it all about.

Soo... I also have a love of nice guys. My boyfriend is the nicest and sweetest person in the world and he has an attraction to powerful... (occasionally highmatenience) ladies such as myself. He thinks we kick ass, and we do. Are there downsides? Absolutely. (Did I mention the high maitenence?) And I love him for being down to earth homebody who's totally in touch with his inner child. Are there downsides? Sometimes he's too nice to even send food back at a restuarant, which drives me insane.

Zombie, it isn't about nice guys vs. Assholes, it's about finding someone who wants you for you for more qualities than just being nice. Rejection is never fun, but nor is an incompatable relationship. Find some girls who don't like assholes becuase I assure you, not all of them do.

Mermaid on the breakwater

God damn, you were coming across well until you said about the sending food back thing. I work in a restaraunt and the people who send food back are nasty bastards. I have to say, we don't get many complaints but when we do get them, it's from the same bloody type, all mouth and no manners. Also, I get kind of pissed off when the older ladies shout at the female waitresses and then smile when I serve them and when the old blokes shout at me and smile at the young waitresses.

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Doors 2, an anthology: http://www.lulu.com/content/3522683

ClancyBoy

Snarky non-sequitur + low content + unprovoked bitchiness = your post is shit.



I'm reading "nice guy" as "doormat."

Back when I dated, I would pay attention to two types of girls. Girls who clearly had no self-esteem and would be easy to fuck and dump with no repercussions, and girls who I respected and seriously wanted to spend time with.

You can tell one from the other almost at first glance, and it's impossible to respect someone who doesn't respect themselves. Even an extremely nice person will only try to cheer someone up for so long before they give up on them and look for better material.

Same goes for guys, same goes in any situation. People typically get what they deserve, socially speaking.

I'm not saying that these people are losers and don't deserve happiness. I'm saying you get out of relationships what you put into them. Make yourself the kind of person you would want to date, and that's what you'll attract.


FWIW, I used to be the "nice guy" of the group and only dated needy self-loathing emotional black holes like I myself was. Which of course was miserable for both of us. Two morose assholes whining to each other about their "needs" not being met. I was that way right up until I hit my late 20's and I decided to do something about it.

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"Mother Hitton's Littul Kittons wait for you down there. Little pets they are, little little little pets. Cute little things, they say. Don't you believe it. No man ever saw them and walked away alive. You won't either. That's the final dash, flash. That's the utter clobber, cobber." --Cordwainer Smith, Norstrillia.