Hey all,
Yup, it’s me again. I’ve got a lot of things to say, so unless you’re looking to hear a 15 year old kids thoughts, turn back now.
So yeah, another thread from me however, I’m not as depressed as I was a fortnight ago. With school over I’ve had more time to set my priorities straight, and you know, it’s funny what happens when you read something you wrote about yourself only a short time ago, and immediately start judging that person as if he or she is someone completely new. It hurts sometimes, but it always helps. I never realised it before, but all the problems that I’ve faced and am facing aren’t all that bad.
I mean, now that my head is clear from the stresses of school and having to watch my back and never slip up in-case I give people another reason to peck my head, I’ve been able to
really think. Now, I’ll address my
weight issue first, I mean should my weight be deemed a characteristic? I don’t think it should do. I don’t judge people on their weight, so I don’t see why I should let people judge me upon it.
Now, socially, it’s pretty much just hit me, even though you guys have been saying it all along. These people are nothing, their just people I’ll know for maybe a few more years before I move on with life and forget about more or less all of them. Okay, maybe I’ll get depressed here and there, have a little moan at myself, but that’s just it, it’s not going to affect me is it? I know damn right who my friends are, and if some others come along and feel as if they want to get to know me, that’s just an added bonus.
Though, taking the tone down to a more depressing mood, I have noticed recently that what-ever you do, most people are going to find it strange and unusual. The thing about this point is that, when you do something different, for some reason everybody seems to know and casually fit it into conversations, which make you/me feel really awkward. Is it on purpose? Most likely, but sometimes curiosity gets the better of us. Anyway, what some of you guys said (possibly just JosephB if I remember correctly) was that when I go to college/university, I will find a group of like-minded people, and I really hope I do. Unlike most people of which I linger around, I love people who do things differently, they interest me a lot more than the average ‘cool’ guy.
As well as this, I've found that my love for media is beginning to grow. I watch many TV Shows, and find that the way they position the camera, use the right light and stuff is amazing. It's a whole new idea of a future for me, so I went to look for some decent video camera's and WOAH! Who knew they'd be so damn much?? But I realised that If I save up all the money I ever recieve, I can buy it when I'm about 18
Of course, I'm not going to do that. My I.T lessons next year have a lot to do with Camera's etc. so I'll be sticking with that. Looks like a cool new aspect of a future that excites me though. That, and writing of course
Well, to conclude, thanks to those who read the whole lot and I apologise for boring you with my thoughts, just had a feeling I’d update you and just needed somewhere to put them down on paper. The only worry I have is that, in a later date, my lack of social skills will affect me greatly. Yet maybe that’s a sacrifice I have to make.
Have a lovely rest of the summer,
Tom.
P.S Going to see The Dark Knight tomorrow, which I'm really hyped about. All my mates have been going on about how totally awesome it is
