moni

We share love and hate relationships with people around us.Its different with everyone. A mutual understanding, a mutual love and an indifference.
Sometimes we want people to like us; sometimes we want to make friends. But sometimes this doesnot happen. I had luck in enjoying a good friendship for over a decade now. But lately the indifference in attitiude is starting to bother me. Its been well over a year since this began and it is escalating. At times I get anxious. I tried to ask the reason but could not get an appropriate response.
Genuine people are genuinely rare to find and distancing myself from someone like that seemed like a madness. I can always forgive the people I love but I cant stand indifference. I got desperate and the fact that distances separate us even more now, makes it even harder to recoincile. I hate to watch curtains fall on this sweet friendship.

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MONI

Wreybies

Ok, are you ready? Got you thick skin on? I'm going to focus on the grammar in your piece because this is something that will turn your readers away from your work. Everything in red:


agreement in number

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni A mutual understanding, a mutual hate and an indifference.

I think that you are listing relationships here, but it is unclear.

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni Sometimes we want people to like us, sometimes we want to make friends.

There are two independent clauses in this sentence. Seperate with a semicolon for contrast. A comma is incorrect.

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni But when this does not happen we get frustrated. I had a luck in enjoying a good friendship for over a decade now. But lately the indifference in attitiude is starting to bother me.

Are you really ready to speak for all humanity when you say we get frustrated? In this instance the word luck would not take an article. It would be just I had luck in enjoying...

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni Its been well over a year since this began and it is escalating. At times I get anxious, tried to ask the reason but could not get an appropriate response.

You switch tense within the sentence. That's a no-no.

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni Genuine people are genuinely rare to find and distancing ourselves from the ones we already have is madness.

You are sermonizing. Speaking more to your own experience is more effective than preaching to the reader about how the world works.

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni I can always forgive and forget the people I love but I cant stand indifference.

You have misused this phrase. It makes it sound as if first you forgive and then you forget the people you love.

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni I got desperate and the fact that distance separates us even more now, makes it even harder to recoincile.

Verb agreement.

Quote:

Originally Posted by moni I hate to watch curtains falling on this very sweet freindship.

No one would want to see the curtains fall on a sweet friendship.

dhyre

Alright, I am going to leave the editing up to Wreybies, becuase it seems that they have alot to say.. I am going to give you my gut from the peice.

It sounds like a journal entry, and I am not saying diary because it did not feel "private" to me, it felt kind of like a blog. Although it is only one paragraph, I feel it could go somewhere if you gave it direction. What is this to you?

weeds

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"Truth is complex, truth has many points of view"

~*vantage point*~

Prof

Good coverage of grammar Wreybies. (I don't much like "I had a luck" but otherwise-) As a response to the original posting I'll add my two cents worth. Friends come in three types.

Type A friends are friends because of propinquity. Likely the first friends anyone has are type A. You play with the kids in your neighborhood because they are the only ones accessible. At school most of the people in your class fall into the Type A area.

Type B friends are people with whom you share a common interest. They start to appear in your life when you begin to make choices. Shall I sing in the school choir? Shall I play football? Shall I devote my time to skateboarding? The others in that activity become Type B friends. These are the people you spend time with. These are the people who you usually mean when you think of your friends.

Type B friendships are all a lot people have. They break up and at times that can be traumatic. Moni, it sounds like what you are wrting about. Let me give an example of type A and Type B friends from my own experience. I was a high school teacher for many years. Most other teachers at the school were, to me. type A friends. The teachers in my own department were Type B friends. We would go out after school, get together on weekends, and in general do the things friends do. When I switched schools I left behind all my old type B friends and soon became Type B friends with some of the teachers in my department at the new school. The old type Bs gradually drifted away since the two schools in question were in different States.

You can also lose a type B friend if you get into an area outside of your common interests. I lost a good type B friend, he and I had been golf buddies for years. One day we got into a discussion on politics. We were at opposite ends of the political spectrum and after we found that out neither of us could quite see the other as we had in the past. He is now a type A friend. I still see him around, butt we don't spend time together.

Oh, there are type C friends, but they are rare. Many people go through their entire lives without making a type C friend. Type C friends complete each other. One the perfect host the other the perfect guest. One the perfect talker the other the perfect listener. I have one type C friend, my wife. I wouldn't have room in my life for another type C.

I don't know if that helped, but is does explain the situation you are describing.

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Don't look back, something might be gaining.

terrib

great edit Wreybies!

moni

i appreciate the response and thanks for correcting the grammar....
yes it was from a personal experience...and something i would normally write in my journal..just wanted to see if my writing is any good....thanks for the encouragement..!

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MONI