Some amazing junk... - Writers Forum

king601 · 02-24-2008, 10:37 PM

I started writing this and want to shove it out of my mind...

Quote:

The Super Human Race: Book 1

The Gene

Before you read!

This is a work of fiction. All things are not based on true facts; it is a work of fiction. Characters made up have no resemblance in real life. I do not indent this to be true at all, if it is then that would be cool… Ha anyway, I hope you enjoy The Super Human Race: Book 1.

Chapter 1

I looked out, this was one of the ‘final’ weeks or so until everyone would have some trait or whatever changed so they become super human… I don’t want to become a super human, it brain washes people. I like my brain and all I know, as you may not know I’m a ‘super’ genius. They first involved me in this project when I was 18, I’m 20 now. It has taken a little over 2 years to develop and to send out these treatments which will make everyone a super human.
Now, I don’t really have anything wrong with what they are doing but it seems as not every one uses it for good. I will stop these treatments. I will make everyone normal, but we’re going to have a long journey…
Before we begin I think I’d be best to fill you all in on the two years that you’ve not been around. In 2060 a man by the name of Zarck Hizenoff approached me an asked me if I would be interested in helping a project that he called shrg53. I assumed that it meant super human race gene 53, the 53 for the gene number on the 24th chromosome. He said that the gene project what it did was split the gene into a platform and then they separated the parts of the DNA, then when they separated them they would pick the normal human gene out and replace it with a super gene. I saw it as a simple thing that wouldn’t be hard to do, so I took the job. The facility we went to was a warehouse it was a sterile place inside, it had to be. Looking back upon that short time I worked there. The entrance had a bio-metric scanner for the finger prints, the iris of the eye, and you had to enter a 4-digit code. I was entered into the system and given my 4 digit code, 2593.

I might continue writing it if you all think it may be a good start... but i doubt it lol

Sen Yama · 07-02-2008, 11:03 PM

Yeah, show a bit more. Always remeber to balance all of the tell there you have with a bit of show. When you tell about entering th efacility for the first time, switch to showing.

With some work, it could be a really good beginning. Don't get discouraged, keep writing! ^_^