WritingForums.com - Writing Forums, Writing Challenges, Critiques and Help for Writers Home Rules FAQ Members Groups Calendar Gallery Search
» Sign Up «

Hello Unregistered,
It looks you have never posted to our site before! Why not make your first post today by saying hello to our community in our Introduce Yourself forum. Why not start with your first post today and become an active part of our growing community of writers!
  Search Forums
Lit.Org - Bootcamp for writers. Post your work and other writers review it, it's that easy.

Advanced Search



Go Back   Writing Forums > Creativity > File 13
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

File 13 Got something you were going to throw away, something that just didn't fit or work out the way you planned? Share it here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 06-25-2007, 12:10 PM   #1
Ink Slinger
 
sanctuary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: in the prison of my own mind
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,645
sanctuary is on a distinguished road
something I dug up

Untitled

Rayna expelled the air she had been holding as she leaned heavily against a tree and clutched her right arm. Her ragged breathing was visible in the cold December air, and flurries, too light to be considered a true snowfall, drifted around her body and melted as soon as they came in contact with her skin. Letting her arm dangle at her side, Rayna pulled her hand away and studied the blood that smeared her hand, peering through her ever-present black-tinted sunglasses with a mixed look of detached interest. The fresh knife wound wasn’t hurting yet, a sure sign that she’d have to see Jack, her long-time friend and physician, and Rayna wanted to curse aloud at the thought of getting more stitches. The wooded area surrounding her supplied Rayna with ample cover, an advantage that was almost crucial to the sick game of life and death she was currently playing. She was barely visible to anyone watching as she blended in with the piles of snow that had accumulated amongst the trees, and her carefully planned outfit, made up of clothes she could move in easily, turned Rayna into just another part of the landscape. Shifting her stance, Rayna only moved enough to see her target; he stood between two other men who, in all likelihood, were his bodyguards. These men, however, could not protect their employer from a sniper shot to the head. Ah, the wonders of modern technology she thought with a smirk. Taking her aim, she held breath to steady her hand. Rayna peered through the scope of her rifle, finger poised on the trigger. The shot was lined up in seconds. All she needed to do was twitch her finger and the job would be over…


Jake lunged for the ringing phone, cursing under his breath as he did so. He placed the book he was reading, a new Alex Jefski bestseller one of his buddies had recommended, on the desk.
“Hello,” he answered tiredly.
“Good afternoon, is this Mr. O’Conner?”
“This is he.”
“Mr. O’Conner, I am calling on behalf of Lt. Daris. He requests that you come to the station immediately. He said, and I quote, ‘you’ve never seen anything like this’.”
Jake glanced at the clock on the wall; it was a little past 11 in the morning on his day off. He debated whether or not he should just hang up the phone, but Daris wouldn’t call him in without a reason.
“I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
“Great, thank you,” the secretary replied before hanging up.
Looking at the book on his desk, Jake sighed. He was well into the first chapter, and he was already hooked. Now he abandoned any hope of finishing it today as he stood, clicked off the light and left for the precinct.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks.
__________________
sanctuary is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-25-2007, 12:15 PM   #2
Adept Writer
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: MI, USA
Gender: Female
Posts: 865
FoggyImagination is an unknown quantity at this point
There's minor grammar issues and whatever but... I want to know what happens!!!!
__________________
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seuss
FoggyImagination is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-25-2007, 12:44 PM   #3
Ink Slinger
 
sanctuary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: in the prison of my own mind
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,645
sanctuary is on a distinguished road
*blinks*
All right all right, I'll work on it!
I wrote this about a year ago and never came back to it...maybe now I will...
__________________
sanctuary is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-19-2007, 09:42 PM   #4
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: I live in a house. Duh!
Gender: Female
Posts: 9
Azooga is on a distinguished road
I want to know what happens as well, good thing they have this thread...eh? Ahh! My "A" key isn't working right. *hits key repeatedly*
Azooga is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-19-2007, 10:36 PM   #5
Ink Slinger
 
sanctuary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: in the prison of my own mind
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,645
sanctuary is on a distinguished road
Maybe I'll actually get around to finishing it....
*wonders is "A" key is functioning properly*
__________________
sanctuary is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-20-2007, 12:12 AM   #6
Ink Slinger
 
Shinn's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Anstead, North London (...or New Zealand)
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,986
Shinn is on a distinguished road
Send a message via AIM to Shinn Send a message via MSN to Shinn Send a message via Yahoo to Shinn
Hope you do get it finished, Sanctuary.

I'd really like to critique it.
__________________


~ Why am I...Why am I losing to someone like you? ~
Shinn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-20-2007, 12:45 AM   #7
Ink Slinger
 
sanctuary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: in the prison of my own mind
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,645
sanctuary is on a distinguished road
*shrugs*
I'll get to it after my school stuff is finished. I really want to finish this piece.
__________________
sanctuary is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:26 PM.
Powered by vBulletin, Copyright ©2000-2007, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0


 
You are NOT Logged In.
User Name:

Password




Related Links

Link to Us:
Writing Forums - Discussions for Writers