Jim's Voices - Writers Forum

Glen1 · 09-30-2006, 07:26 AM

Voices bother Jim from dawn to dusk. He tries working with his computer each morning before breakfast.
The voices tell him, “:Jim get off the computer and go talk to the people outside. You’re working too long. You’ll get sick.”
Jim looks at his watch and he has 15 more minutes until breakfast. He mumbles, “Voices, I have plenty of time. It’s only 7:45 and my breakfast is at 8:00. I have to finish this project.”
Breakfast time arrives and Jim goes to the dining room. Jim likes to eat cornflakes every morning. As he is eating them the voice in his mouth says, “Still Smoke, you’re eating too fast. You should take your time.”
Somehow Jim can communicate with the voice in his mouth. Jim replied, “Voice, I’m in no hurry. I’ve just got to go to school and I’ve got to leave by 8:35.”
“Why don’t you skip class and eat more breakfast? We are waiting for our go ahead to move to another location.”

*****

Jim leaves for class and he can still hear the voices as the cars pass by him on the street. They say, “Ladies and Gentlemen, Jim is on his way to school. He’ll be back by 11 o’clock.”
Jim enters the classroom and the voices are not there. He goes to his seat and still no voices. Although he is in the classroom , he can still hear them on the outside.
After class, they catch up to him again on his way home. They say, “Jim, your father will be moving you to an apartment. There you will have a kitchen and you will be able to do anything that you want to do.”
It is now late afternoon and Jim is in his room. He mentions to his roommate that, “I’m going to be taking sometime today 15 tablets of Zyprexa that will help me get rid of the voices.”
That night he took the 15 Zyprexa tablets. His roommate saw him take them and shortly afterwards he called the facility office. His roommate explained to the aides that he took 15 of his 20 mg. Zyprexa tablets. They in turn called the paramedics. The paramedics arrived and they took him to the nearest hospital. From there he was transferred to the nearest Psychiatric Hospital.

*****

The next morning he awoke and asked the nurse who was there, “Where am I?”
She replied, “You’re in a psychiatric facility. You took an overdose of Zyprexa and passed out. The paramedics took you to a local hospital and from there you were transferred here.”
“Oh! Now I remember that I wanted to take 15 of my Zyprexa tablets to help get rid of my voices. Will I still have the voices?”
“You won’t have them as long as you take your medicine as the doctor prescribes. We’ll be giving you new medicines that will help you. After about six weeks, the voices will be gone. You’ll be here for two weeks and then you’ll return to your facility.”
“Good, I’m glad that I won’t have the voices.”
Two weeks Later:
Jim returns to his facility and the voices are still there but off in the distance. They do not bother him when he is in the shower or is eating. He has also gone back to his classes at school.
A Year Later:
Jim is now free of the voices. He continues to take the new medicines and is doing fine. He writes a little each day and works with his computer. His days are filled with fun and joy. He has a girl friend and they are thinking about getting married.
616 words

WisdomSeeker · 10-01-2006, 10:43 AM

Well Glen1...
The whole concept here was certainly inviting. Not sure if you're speaking from personal experience...either way, this is a world that few speak of...and few know about.

My 19 year old daughter has PDD (Pervasive Development Disorder - characteristics of Autism and Asbergers Syndrome). Currently she is hospitalized in a facility where she is undergoing neurological and psychological evaluations.

She has a roommate whom she has developed a close, heartwarming relationship with. Ironically, this roomie's real name is, "Echo." Echo hears voices that tell her to do awful things to herself. They make her pace and cry. She's tried committing suicide several times there, the last of which was wrapping the television cord around her neck. It's truly heartwrenching, to say the least.

This is not something that can be tuned out, or turned off...is it? It's so difficult to understand. And, while you have placed this write in File 13 (I think it's supposed to be 19...whatever), I still enjoyed it and its imperfections.

Thank you for sharing!
~ws~

Mungye · 10-26-2006, 04:02 PM

I have a daughter that has gone through some terrible things, and I have worked with others who have suffered terribly with different afflictions, some health based that led to the psychiatric and some stricktly psychiatric.
This is a story worth expanding and telling. Because unless someone has gone through this they can truly hurt another that is.
Many think telling the afflicted person to pull themselves together will help. It is a nightmare of a life and for some even meds do not in the end help.
I like the way it is told simply. I would keep it very very simple so that we can see through the eyes of Jim and listen to what he listens to, react the way he does.
It has great potential. I urge you to go ahead and work on it.I think as someone who has worked with the abused and challenged that even doctors would appreciate the article. I would carefully do my research and submit it to a medical magazine. You would be suprised how well it could be received.Often physicians and specialists are looking for just this sort of read to help the families and friends of sick or challenged individuals and think of what good your story can do.
Wisdom, it hurts my heart to hear of your daughter and little Echo and I will lift them up in my prayers. Life can be so cruel to our children. You sound like a wonderful person.

Quillpen · 10-27-2006, 04:44 PM

Good job.You seem to change tenses after two weeks later.You told it from a sort of "we are telling a happy ending recovery story told on feel good film" sort of point of veiw from there on out.I like the way you did for the first bit more.