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Old 02-17-2008, 09:36 PM   #1
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Join Date: Feb 2008
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drevil915 is on a distinguished road
Query Letter - United We Stood, Divided We Fell

Hello,

I've been reworking and retooling my query letter for a manuscript I've been working on for the last few years. I'd really appreciate any feedback I could get on it. Thanks a lot!

~

A sudden, terrified vow, "Wait for me Nicole. I’m coming for you," as the whole of America descends into a great civil war. Again.

And as American Civil War II rains down, Robbie Marshall makes that promise to bring back the only thing he’s ever lived for, the girl he is almost certain is "the one." Nicole. But he finds himself unprepared, torn from his home and his every waking memory. Without a car, yet bound by an almost mythic sense of honor, Robbie sets out on an eight-hundred-mile odyssey across the war-torn United States.

Along the way, he crosses paths with Adara Bahiya, beautiful and provocative. The war’s lethal hand casts them in an indestructible bond: a passion so magnificent it transcends all else. And as the conflict closes in, Robbie’s own war-torn past haunts him. Did he make the right choice to leave everything behind, for one girl he is "almost" sure of? Were they together for love? Or need? With everything he knows turned backward, Robbie makes one final decision-a decision between the love of the ages with Adara, or the love of what he knows, his honor and his promise. Nicole.

UNITED WE STOOD, DIVIDED WE FELL is a 96,000-word contemporary war drama. I would like to send the novel manuscript for your consideration and possible representation. Thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely,

-Jason Iacono
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