I apologize in advance if this is a bit long as Im new to posting here. Just looking for some general responses on the drive and direction of the story. Not really looking for grammar help but if you see something let me know. Also, Id like to try and improve the initial dialogue between Nathan and Empyreal so anything on that would be great too. Thanks for Reading!!
Part 1
For most 24 year olds, life was going pretty fast. For Nathan however, life couldn't have possibly been moving any slower. Watching aimlessly as all his friends started their careers Nathan spent quiet nights alone endlessly dreaming about the future he was beginning to think would never come. For all his life he thought he was different. He knew at a young age that being special would somehow alienate him, and his present state spoke for itself. For years things just never seemed to go his way but he always held his head up. Although amazingly intelligent, he lacked a voice that people could connect with, even when what he said was what they wanted to hear. Such disappointment can be tough on a person, and in many ways this was true for Nathan. But something kept pushing him to wait it out. "Your day will come...." he always told himself. So at the start of a new semester in college, he opened up the course catalog, closed his eyes and pointed.
Keeping track of all the classes and career paths he had chosen over the last 6 years was nearly impossible. His latest bout at trying to be a novellist had ended with a major lack of motivation. Like always, the ideas trapped inside his head were too much for people to understand. It was as if his vision were so clear, people just saw right through it. One of the more obvious beliefs that set him apart was his lack of belief in a higher power. It never bothered him that he was an atheist, but it did set him apart from about 90% of the people he met. Either way, his destiny at least in his own mind was set, and one day he would acheive some level of greatness. To what extent, however, he had no clue. After deciding that photo/journalism was his next step to enlightenment, Nathan got comfortable in his usual spot on the couch and laid back for what he hoped would be a grueling night of Halo 2 on his XBOX360. He had recently picked up online gaming as a sort of outlet for all the upsets his current path kept leading him to, so tonight he planned on really "laying down the law," as he so graciously liked to say. Things were going his way for a change, at least in the game, when suddenly his 42" Samsung HDTV went spazo. Before the controller that fell from his hands as he lunged forward could hit the ground, he was on his hands and knees in front of the TV desperately searching for the source of his problems.
"God Damnit!!!!" he shouted.
"Who me? No thats my brother." a voice barely audible through the snow said.
After a quick glance at the beer he was drinking and trying to remember how many he had drank already..."I am so not tripping that hard." he said.
"Are you sure?" the voice from the TV said louder this time. And just then the TV went back to normal, GAME PAUSED staring Nathan right in the face once more. He looked at his beer again and scratched his head. "What is going on" he said to himself. A cigerette sounded perfect at that point and after trashing the Heineken he was drinking, he went out to the porch for just that. He had always thought of himself as a pretty observent guy. Even more so at picking out noises.( he had a thing for Music Production when he was 20.) He was almost positive the voice he heard was real but only a few minutes of rethinking and a little nicotine was going to help him now.
The night was brisk and very quiet for a change. Living next to Interstate 5 was nice for Ocean views but horrible for noise. Strange though that at 11:30 on a saturday night things were as quiet as they were. Even the sound of his lighter igniting seemed like the only thing he could hear. The sound of a car whizzing past on the interstate in front of him eased his mind a bit as he took the last couple of drags off his cigerette. With one last puff he aimed at his favorite ash tray, the lone bush on his front porch, and fired away as usual. Just before he turned around however, the bush completely lit on fire in a quick burst and what almost looked like a face seemed to peer back at him through the flames. He would have thought he was dreaming if he hadn't slammed his head on his front door as he jarred backward from the fire. But as he looked around he could see that there was a couple in the parking lot not even 30 feet away that seemed clueless to what was happening. This realization suddely took over Nathan and in a sick panic he clumisly ran back into his apartment as fast as he could. He whipped around like lightning and slammed the door shut, locking it immidiately before he crouched down against the door sweating all over himself. Most people would have probably been on the brink of a mental break down at this point but not Nathan. Though fear in some way was definately a factor for him, he could only sort of sit there and laugh about it. Within in seconds Nathan was rolling around on the floor laughing so hard his stomach was hurting. That's when all the lights suddenly went out. As his laughter slowly died off the voice he had heard before started speaking again, and this time much more seriously.
"Look, I'd love to stay here and play games all night but I need your help Nathan of Earth."
"Nathan of Earth? What are you ruling more than one planet these days?"
"Hah, you're very funny, but Im not your supreme being, Im his brother."
"Ok what? I know I might be drunk but supreme gods with brothers too? What have you been smoking Nathan?" he thought to himself. "Is this some kind of joke?" he asked aloud.
"Hmm, obviously God hasn't told your people of his existance yet, its actually very common, let me...."
"Woah woah woah there mist..eh... whatever the hell you are...First off, God has a lot of people on this planet doing all types of stupid things for him but Im not one of them. Secondly, its gonna take a lot more than some burning bush and messing up my TV to get me to believe anything I might be hearing right now is the truth."
"Hmm, are you sure God is making people do things for him? Like a king?"
"Well I wouldn't call it forcing but yes. In fact he's got about 3 or 4 big groups of people killing eachother daily over which way of worshiping him is right. It all makes me sick!"
"What you are explaining is something extremely against the laws of my council. The job of a supreme being is to protect and aid the life that inhabits the galaxies we preside over. Beyond that I know my brother to be incredibly tenacious at following the stirct guidelines of our work, so this really can't be true."
"Well it is, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but maybe your brother is not who you thought he was."
"No, it only further proves my original assumption. My brother, God, hasn't been here for a long time and no one has been alerted. Your people have seemingly come up with ideas of their own, and who knows what amounts of irreparairable damage has been done."
"You're telling me...Heh. Hey could you turn the lights back on? This is getting kind of creepy."
"Oh yes, I apologize." the voice replied. As the lights came on he continued, "So you might be wondering why I chose you Nathan, and for that I really can only say that you seemed like a good bet."
Something really strange was obviously at the bottom of all this, but on a boring and utterly depressing night such as this one, Nathan just sort of went a long for the ride as he and the so called Supreme Being continued to discuss the situation. According to the supreme being, who likes to be called Empyreal by the way, God and himself are part of an ancient group of supernatarual beings who's sole purpose is to serve and protect the galaxies of the universe; sort of like an intergalactic police/environmental protection force. He also proceeded to catch Nathan up on the most recent happenings that led him to Earth and explained the absolute necessity of finding out how and why God and possibly many other supreme beings were disappearing. For most people, sitting in their living room speaking to an invisible voice about gods and the universe would make them question their sanity. Nathan on the other hand loved it. It took him some getting used to at first, but the idea of an invisble being inviting him on a quest to save the universe was like winning the lottery. If it was really happening, this was the moment he had been waiting for his entire life. He couldn't help but laugh to himself...
The Truth About God - SF Short Part 1
Don't worry about me getting too preachy with this. Though its not mentioned here, the supreme beings (Empyreal and God) are not actually "gods" at all. I'll obviously explain more on them later, but the main plot points will stem from a documentary I saw about the "nature" of the universe. Essentially my idea was that on a grand enough scale(the supreme beings) the universe could be manipulated similarly to how we manipulate our environment here on Earth. I dont want to go into it too much, just keep reading my posts if you enjoy it so far! Thanks again for the help, Im gonna use it... :p
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