WriterDude

This is a story I've started writing, but as I don't have the time to write it as a full novel (I've got three other novels to prioritize), I've decided I should instead write it here, just for you. I hope you like it And while some things might be a bit odd, most things will be solved through the story. If you wonder about something, please PM me instead of asking here, as I won't interrupt the story by telling you here.



HELL HATH NO FURY... LIKE ME.

Prologue
She felt the first bullet hit her in the chest, but for a strange reason, it didn't hurt. She looked puzzled at the blood soaking her clothes, when a second bullet hit her in the stomach. Slowly, the shock started giving up and was replace by an intense pain.
"Why... what did..." She opened her mouth to say something, but her words drowned in blood. Her blood. She dropped to her knees, and swayed a bit before she fell backwards and crashed into the asphalt.
"The Queen of Diamonds says hi, bitch," a man said, and she felt a cold gun being pushed towards her forhead. "You can't stop us. Now bye-bye."
She heard a loud noise, but never registered any pain. All was quiet and peaceful. The world around her faded to black, and she draw her last breath of air. Then... nothing.


Chapter 1
"Whoa!" She opened her eyes and blinked several times. What had just happened? Where was she? Who was she? It felt like she had been asleep for days, and her memory felt a bit empty. She remembered only fragments, but not who she was or where she was. It felt comfortable in a way, but the air was a bit heavy and hard to breathe.
"Wait..., this isn't my bed," she said to herself and looked around. It was dark, but she saw she was in a tiny box of some sort. A wooden box, covered in silk. Silk, as in...
"A coffin," she said low, not knowing what to make of it. A coffin? Was this some sort of sick joke? Who would have done something like that, and why do it to her? She was just... just... damn, she didn't remember. It could wait. First, she had to get out. She laid her hands against the top of the coffin and pushed as hard as she could. The lid was really have, but slowly raised itself. A few more attempths, and it finally opened. She sat up and breathed heavily in the fresh air, and shook her head. It was dark here as well, and full of coffins. She counted six of them, including hers. The room itself was made from stone, and there was only one door leading out. It was like a crypt.
"Or a mausoleum," she said to herself, and she remembered being shot. Had she... no, she couldn't. Still, she was in a coffin, in a crypt, like she had... died. She never survived being shot. She had died... and now she was brought back to life.
"Forget it, it only happens in the movies," she told herself. It must have been a sick joke, or perhaps someone put here believing her dead. She felt her stomach and chest, but couldn't find any wounds. It was odd. Shouldn't she at least have a scar or two? Even her forhead was fine, and she still felt the cold gun being pressed towards it.
"Sarah McCrowley, beloved wife of Rick and mother of Jessica," she read on the placket under her coffin. Sarah McCrowley, beloved wife and mother. Her? Did she... have a family? That would explain the mausoleum. She or her husband must have been from a rich family, or else they wouldn't be able to afford this place.
The coffin next to her was small and read "Jessica McCrowley. Beloved daughter of Rick and Sarah." The one next to that was Rick's. Even worse, all three had died within two days. It all started coming back to her now. She had been pregnant with their second daughter, but she and the doctor was the only one who knew. It was to be a surprise for Rick's birthday a week later. One night she had walked from work to the bus station as usual, and saw someone in trouble. Four guys had killed a fifth guy, and one of them spotted her. She had gotten away, but was declared a witness in the trial. She had thought she had done society a favour by telling everything she knew, and all four had gone to prison for years thanks to her. Unfortunately they were only smaller thugs involved in something bigger, involving someone named the Queen of Hearts. This Queen had sent thugs after her and her family as payback, and she, Rick and Jessica (and their unborn kid) had all been killed.
Sarah sunk to her knees and started crying. Her entire family, killed because she saw something she wasn't supposed to have seen.

Several minutes later, her tears and sorrow turned to something else. Hatred. She understood now. Her family was killed, and someone was going to pay. Bigtime.
"I'm coming for you, Queen bitch." She said angrily to whoever listened. "You. Are. Going. To, Pay."

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WriterDude

Chapter 2

The Queen of Diamond was going to pay. Big time. Of that, Sarah was sure. No one killed her family (and herself) and lived. Not when... She didn't even want to think about it. Not when her husband and both kids were killed, and especialy as Rick didn't know about the second kid and not when all she had done was being at the wrong place at the wrong time. But how was she going to kill the Queen? She didn't even know who she was, or where she was. For all she knew, the Queen could be in another city by now, or even in a new country.
She had to start somewhere. Maybe if she found the police records, she could see if there was anythng written about the murderers. If the Queen was such a crime boss as she expected, she would probably have her own file in the police station as well. It might not be much, but at least it would be something.
Sarah smiled. She had a plan. Of course, she had no idea how to enter the police station, find the file on the Queen, pick it up and leave again without anyone noticing, but that could probably wait. First things first.
She had to get dressed. Someone had put her in a white, shoulderless, low-cut dress with white gloves that went up to her elbows and shoes with high heels. She expected she wore nice makeup as well so she could look pretty in the afterlife. Normally she would love to wear something like this, but not now. It would just make her stand out from the crowd. She broke the heels of her shoes to make walking easier and more comfortable, but what about the dress and stupid haircut? She was used to having her hair flow own her back or in a pony tail, but this time it was in a stupid-looking bun in the neck with small tiara on top of her head. She felt like a princess from an old fairy tale, and expected her mother to know something about that. It was her style. Sarah put the tiara back in the coffin and loosened her hair. It felt much better.
Strangely, she wasn't cold, even if there was a cold wind blowing in from the outside. She opened the door to the mausoleum a tiny bit, and was blinded by the sun. Her eyes weren't used to such sharp light after having been dead for... for how long? A day? A week? A month, even? She had no idea. But either way, she could wait a few hours more until dark. In the meantime, she had work to do. She opened other coffins and checked the corpses and their clothes. Rick wore a black suit, which could come in handy. Sarah apologized to Rick and slowly removed it, being careful not to rip it. A few minutes later, she folded the white dress and put it carefully in her own coffin. It just might come in handy at some point, but not now. Instead, she put on Rick's dress and buttoned it up to hide the white shirt under it as much as possible. Rick was a few sizes taller than her, but that wasn't so important right now.

Finally, the sun started fading and night came. It went quite dark in the mausoleum, but Sarah didn't care. She could see fair enough outside after having stayed so long in darkness and didn't have any problems navigating between the tombstones and mausoleums until she reached the church. The door opened easily without a sound, and she slipped in, forming a plan in her head. She opened the jacket a bit and tore off two buttons on her shirt, and then loosened her belt just enough to still keep the pants on, but so it looked like someone had tried to rip it off against her will.

"Fat...father..." she said when she saw a priest and sank to her knees, crying. "He.. helpe me..."
The priest looked surprised and shocked at her, but sat down and laid an arm comfortable around her.
"What's wrong, my daughter?"
"I've... *sob* I've.. been attack.... attacked..." Sarah said, trying to sound convincing. "They... oh, God, they...."
She started crying even harder, hoping the priest would take the hint. When he didn't, she asked him to call the police. The priest finally let her go, and went for the phone in his office. It was going perfectly. When the police arrived, she would tell them her story about being robbed and almost raped, and then agree to come to the police station to give her statement. This was going perfectly according to her plan...

WriterDude

Chapter 3

Sarah sobbed and sat down in the chair at the police station. The friendly police woman gave her a cup of tea and a small notepad.
"Miss, I need you to write down everything," she said and searched through her pockets for a pen or pencil. "Excuse me, I must have forgotten a pen. Will you wait here a few seconds? I will be right back."
"S...sure..." Sarah and, careful to wipe her eyes a bit. The police woman left the room, and Sarah knew she only had minutes, tops. How was she to write down something didn't happen? Instead, she got up and checked the door. There was no one around, so she quickly walked out into the corridor and casually walked in the other direction than where the police woman had walked. So far, so good.
"If I were a police woman, where would I put the records...?" She thought. Basement? Maybe, although some put the cells down there to makei it harder to escape. The second floor? It made sense. It was hard to get there if you weren't a police officer, so it should be secure. Sarah looked around at various signs, and found one that said "Stairs up". It was risky, but her best chance.
"Where are you going?" A voice said behind her. Damn. The police woman was back with the pen.
"I... um..." Sarah wondered what to say, but couldn't really find a convincing answer. "I'm going to take a look at the police records, and there isn't anything you can do about it."
"Hold it right there, missy," the police woman said and pulled her gun.
"We can do this the easy way or the hard way," Sarah said, and regret it right after she said it. She must sound like an idiot. What was next, "I'll be back?"
"Hold it right there," the police woman said and aimed the gun at Sarah. "I am putting you behind bars until we figure out what to do with you. Do not try anything, or I will shoot."
"I do not wish to hurt you, lady," Sarah said in a gentle voice and started walking towards the stairs.
"I'm warning you!" the police woman said, but Sarah ignored her. A loud noise was heard, and Sarah felt a sharp pain in her back. Strangely, the pain eased only seconds later, and she turned slowly.
"Now you made my jacked bloody," She said disappointed. "And I liked this jacket."
Ignoring the woman, she continued towards the stairs again. Once again, she was shot in the back. Twice, this time.
"Can you please stop shooting me?" Sarah said annoyed and turned towards the police woman. "It's starting to hurt a bit."
"You..." the police woman looked puzzled at Sarah and her own gun. She could see the blood on the floor, so she knew she had hit. But she had shot Sarah three times in close range, and apparently the bullets had no effect.
Sarah sighed. "Tell me about the Queen of Diamonds, and I will leave. You can forget what just happened here and go home to your family when your shift is over like nothing happened. Queen of Diamonds. It's all I want to know."
"Who are you?" The police woman asked, and Sarah felt her voice tremble in shock or fear.
"I'm just me," Sarah said casually. "You do have the police records up there, right? So take me to them and let's get on with our life."
Another shot, this time a headshot. Sarah felt her head being knocked backward and fell into the stairs. She lifted her hand to her head and wiped off most of the blood, then got back up again.
"Stop shooting me, you crazy..." she said angrily and walked up to the police woman. The police woman aimed the gun at her again, but was to scared to pull the trigger. Sarah grabbed it and tore it away from her. A click on a button on the side loosened the magazine into her hand, and she handed the empty gun back to the police woman.
"I do not wish to hurt you, but we can't keep on doing this all night," Sarah said annoyed. "All I want to know is where to find the Queen of Diamonds. Either ell me where to find her or take me to the police records. Or do I have to knock you out first?"
"You can't get to her," the police woman finally said and lowered the gun. "She's too powerful, even for a drugged up psycho like you. Even we can't find her. We have tracked her down to a ship at Pier 14 called Sophitia. That's all I know."
"See? That wasn't so hard," Sarah said with a smile and thanked the police woman before she started for the exit. Her head and back hurt like crazy, but she ignored the pain for now. She had better things to worry about, like how to get to Pier 14, how to find the ship and how to avoid being killed in the process.

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Aranor

Hmm. First I'm thinking she has been converted into a spirit of vengeance some how. Something like the Crow. Officers usually have pens in their desk not pockets. Perhaps changing that to using the bathroom or something. Not to mention there is usually more than one officer in a police station at a given time. Also, I'm thinking five or six gunshots in a police station would gather the attention of the rest of the force.

WriterDude

It's a bit inspired by The Crow, yes. The whole pen-thing was to give Sarah a way out, as the whole rape-thing was just a decoy. And while a few gunshots in a police station would be noticed, this is late at night when only a few people are at work. More will come, of course, but keep in mind all of this shooting happened really quick. And as for the pen, haven't you misplaced a pen sometimes? It could be so simple as someone had borrowed it. Try no to think too hard. And last, this is the actual story. I won't publish it or re-write it. I've had this going on in my head for a while, and had to write it somewhere. I already have several other projects going on, so I simply don't have time to edit this all the time and spend months on it. I hope you enjoy it anyway. Just thought it would be a fun read, that's all.

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terrib

godt verv writerdude, jeg tru man be vidunderlig.
ditt venninne, Terri

WriterDude

Close, but no cigar, honey.

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Aranor

Just offering my critique. If I were a publisher and you told me you would not consider changing certain things I would say I would not consider your story.
Anyway, story seems good thus far. And yes I have lost my pen before. But not in a police station in a booking room.

RebelliousFantasyLover

Hmmm, It is all right, but I think you need to fix up some spelling errors, and I think just follow what Aranor has said and I think It will be a great story!!!
Keep it up

RFL

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Revenge is coming closer..... RUN

WriterDude

This is the final version, right here and now for you. I won't send it to a publisher or anything. I have too many ideas going on as is, so I decided I could give something back to this nice forum instead of whining about critics, advice and all that. Just this one, here's a full story from start to finish. There will be some spelling errors and logical problems (the missing pen, for instance, and shootings in a police station and no one shows up?). Please ignore small details like that and just enjoy.

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WriterDude

Chapter 4

"Stop her!" The police woman yelled, but Sarah didn't care. She had what she came for. Now all she needed was to get out. "Ma'am, stop or I..."
"... shoot me?" Sarah said with a smile and turned. "Haven't we been through that part already? Bullets can't hurt me. Now, if you don't mind...?"
The police woman looked puzzled at Sarah and wasn't quite sure what she should do. Arrest her? How? Sarah wasn't coming willingly, and to be honest, she hadn't done anything illegal. All she had done was trying to get to the police records, but when the police woman told her what she wanted to know, she turned to leave again. Shoot her? That obviously didn't work.
Finally, backup arrived. Sarah sighed heavily. Three men entered the corridor in front of her, and another woman entered from behind. Sarah was trapped.
"All I want is to leave peacefully," Sarah said in a loud and clear voice, to make sure everyone heard her. "I have done nothing illegal. This woman here shot me a few times, but since when is being shot illegal?"
"You resisted arrest," the police woman said.
"I didn't know I was under arrest at the time. Or even now, for that matter," Sarah said in a casual tone. "I am leaving, and there is nothing you can do about it. If you want to arrest someone, arrest missy trigger-happy over there, This was such a nice jacket. As for me, I am leaving."
She started walking towards the exist, but the three men in between her and the exit clearly didn't plan on letting her go easily.
"Tell me what I did wrong, and I will come quietly," Sarah said.
"You resisted arrest."
"Since when is walking around illegal?"
"Since..." the police woman looked confused. "Since you tried to find the police records. They are classified."
"I was looking for the bathroom. You know, after being raped and all?"
Everyone went quiet for a while, not quite sure what to do about the situation. Sarah had a point. All she did was walk around and being shot.
"Let us at least take you to the hospital," the other woman said. "I can see you are hurt. If you were shot, and we came as soon as we heard the shots, you shouldn't be walking around. You shouldn't even be standing up. There could be internal bleeding, and...."
"..and I don't have time for this," Sarah said. That part was true. Being dead and all hopefully meant she was immortal, but it sure hurt to get shot. She felt dizzy after loosing so much blood, so who could tell how much more she could handle before she died again?
But even if she could get past all five police officers, where would she go? Right now, no one was sure if she was under arrest or not. If she ran, she would be hunted down by the entire police force and thrown behind bars.
"Look, I only want to leave and didn't do anything wrong," she said, getting irritated. "I will leave now, with or without your permission, and there is nothing you can do to stop me. Believe me, she tried."
Sarah slowly removed her jacked, and true enough, the back of her shirt was soaked in blood. Her's.
"Shooting me doesn't work. Stabbing me doesn't work. Beating me senseless only annoys me. There is nothing you can do to stop me, so we can do this the easy way or the hard way. Your choice."
"Crackhead," one of the men said with a sigh. "She doesn't know what she's saying. I suspect she doesn't even know where she is or even who she is."
"Try deadhead," Sarah said with a smile, when a thought came to her. Three rather large men blocked the exit. Two women covered the other exist, and one was scared of her after the shooting incident...
Without a warning, Sarah turned around on her heels and charged towards the two women. She tackled the scared one with her shoulder and used her bodyweight to knock her out of the way. The other one tried to grab her, but Sarah was too strong. She grabbed the other one and pushed her towards the three men, effectivly creating a temporary human barricade. After that, she ran as fast as she could down the corridor, knowing all too well it might be a dead end...

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WriterDude

Chapter 5

Sarah ran down the corridor, through a door and quickly closed it behind her. She quickly pulled a nearby chair and raised it against the doorknob, buying herself some precious time. It didn't take long before she heard loud pounding on the other side of the door, but the chair held... for now.
But to do now? She room she was in was a small office of some sort, with a desk, a cabinet with random, uninteresting files and... and a weaponlocker. It wasn't big and only held a few common guns, but it was weapons. That could really come in handy.
She checked the door in the locker, but it was locked. She sighed frustrated, If she had a gun, she could shoot the lock open and get the guns. But if she had a gun, she wouldn't need these in the first place.
Lacking a better option, she grabbed the chair behind the desk and threw it at the locker. No use. The chair crashed to the floor without as much as a a scratch on the locker. Although there was a window in the locker, it was probably bulletproof. She decided it was more work than it was use, and with her luck the guns weren't even loaded. Why should they be? For safety reasons, ammunition was most likely stored elsewhere. Still, it couldn't be too far away. The desk? She searched through the drawers, and smiled when she spotted a gun under some papers. And even better, the magazine was half-full. It had a capasity of twenty-one bullets, and she counted ten left. Not much, but it would certainly come in handy...
A fireaxe broke through the door, and she knew she didn't have much time. The stupid cops would be on her in less than a minute or two, and she was trapped with no way out. There wasn't even a window here, no airshafts, no secret doors, no nothing.
"If I kill them, I will be as bad as the people who killed me," she told herself and looked at the gun in her hand. These guys, while annoying, only did their job. The Queen and all her minions would die, of that she was sure, but not these cops. They were innocent, like her. (at least, so she thought. She couldn't remember what she had been before she was killed). The gun felt strangely familiar and comfortable in her hand, but it probably didn't mean anything. She had probably been with Rick at the shooting range from time to time.
"You are so in trouble, missy!" A voice said, and she looked at the door. A policeman had broken through the door and remove the chair. The door opened and all five of them entered. Sarah got a desperate idea.
"All I want is to leave," she said and raised her gun. "I suggest you let me go before someone get hurt. And as missy here and my bloody shirt can confirm, it won't be me. Is catching me really worth dying for?"
"No one has to get hurt," A policeman said in a calm voice and took a step towards Sarah. She aimed the gun slightly over his head and pullet the trigger. The bullet hit the wall right behind him, and he stopped.
"The next one won't miss," she said calmly. "Let. Me. Go."
"I'm sure we can..." A policewoman said, but a bullet hit her in the knee. She dropped to the floor and screamed in pain.
"I do not wish to hurt you," Sarah said and tried to remain calm. "All I want to leave. Let me go, or join her. Except I will not aim for the knee next time."
She aimed the gun at one of the policemen and raised it slowly to the groin area. The policemen looked at themselves and wasn't sure what to do.
"In the corner, now!" Sarah yelled and waved the gun towards a corner on the other side of the room. All the five police officers slowly walked where she pointed, careful to keep an eye on her.
Finally, she walked slowly towards the door, aiming the gun at the police officers at all time.
"You," she said to the first police woman, the unhurt one. "You might want to call for paramedics. I did not wish to shoot her, but she gave me no choice. Besides, you shot me several times, so I guess we're even. If either of you follows me..." She raised her gun quickly and fired a shot just above their heads to prove her point. And with that, she dashed out the door and towards the exit.
"That wasn't so hard," she told herself with relief when she finally arrived outside again. She thought about borrowing a police car, but figured it would be a stupid idea. Why steal a car with a built in GPS tracker and two-way radio? She could just as well walk around with a big sign saying "I am here! Arrest me!" while singing Folsom Prison Blues.
Instead, she ran into an alley and crouched behind a dumpster. The shadows hid her feature quite nicely, and she finally allowed herself a few minutes of rest. Her back and head hurt like hell, but at least she was alive. But how? Was she immortal? It certainly didn't feel like it, but she had been shot several times. She could clearly take more than a regular human, but how much more before she died again? And with so much trouble to learn where she might find the Queen, could she possibly kill the Queen herself?
Thirty minutes later, she walked from alley to alley, being careful not to be seen. The cops had sent a few patrols out to search for her, but wether it was luck or chance, she finally arrived back home in the mausoleum.

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WriterDude

(sorry it took a while to continue, had problems with the laptop)


Chapter 6

Sarah dropped to her knees and wanted to scream. The pain in her back and head was getting worse, and she started getting very dizzy. Still, she coulnd't just give up either. She had the location of the Queen of Diamonds, or at least one of the locations. Pier 14, on the ship Sophitia. It was a start.

First things first, though. Her shirt and jacket were soaked in blood, but that wouldn't be acceptable when she was about to gain an audience with a Queen. Queen of Crime, sure, but a Queen nontheless. She removed the jacket and shirt and wondered for a while what to put on instead. Rob a clothes store? No, it wasn't her style. The bad people would pay, but if she endangered innocents, she would be just as bad as the people she hunted.
"The dress," she said low and got an idea. It would be perfect. A white, clean, low-cut and sexy dress. Just what a ghost would wear. In fact, that's what she did wear when she... what exactly? Woke up? Returned to life? She carefully wiped as much blood as possible from herself using the shirt and smiled when she saw she had stopped bleeding. It was almost too perfect.
She put her dress back on and studied herself as best she could. Perfect. She could only imagine the Queen's face when the dead woman suddenly appeared in front of her. With some luck, the Queen would even be asleep when Sarah arrived.
"Goodbye for now," Sarah said in a low voice and looked at Rick and Jessica's coffins. She would be back soon. One way or the other...

Sarah stepped out of the mausoleum and carefully made her way through the graves and mausoleums. A lone guard patroled the area, but he had fortunately not noticed her entering or leaving. He probably didn't expect anything, either. Who would break into a graveyard anyway? There wasn't anything of any value here other than memories, and there was even less chance someone broke out of here.
Something was wrong. Sarah could tell right away the way the guard stared at something Sarah couldn't see. She moved a bit closer and ghasped. Two men were standing in front of the guards - two people with guns, aimed at him. Why would anyone...
Drugs. One of the men handed the guard a small bag the size of the palm of his hand, and the guard handed something back. Cash, probably. A drug deal was going on right in front of her. In front of her home. In front of her family.
"Good evening, boys," she said casually and walked towards the three men. "A bit late, isn't it? You never quite know what you can run into."
"Who the hell are you?" One of the drugdealers said and aimed the gun at her. "You are so dead, missy..."
"You got that right," Sarah said and shrugged. The three people looked confused at her, and before she knew it, she had three bulletholes in her chest.
"Not again!" she said angrily. "I'm sick of getting shot at!"
The three men looked at each other and raised their guns again.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Sarah said casually and walked towards them. She quickly grabbed two of the guns and ripped them out of their hand's. Only the guard has his gun left.
"Let's see..." Sarah said and flipped the guns around. "You shot me. Didn't work. Two of you are unarmed, and I have two guns. Tell me why I should let you live."
The two unarmed people looked at Sarah and stupidly enough, attacked. Boh dropped to the ground almost instantly, killed by her guns. Finally, she turned towards the guard.
"And you," she said angrily. "You are supposed to guard this place! You are supposed to be the good guy!"
Angrily, she kept pulling the triggers on both guns until she ran out of bullets, and smiled. Neither of the three people would get up again. Ever.
She casually discarded the two empty guns and picked up the guard's gun. The magazine was almost full. One bullet was used, but the other twenty was still there. She thought it for a while, then casually discarded it as well next to the dead guard. Guns were so overrated.

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