Thread: First scene of my novel, Scorch (815 words)

'Ello all. I'm in the editing and rewriting stages of my novel, and I've just completely redone the first scene. So here's the deal -- I'm going to post it here, and you're going to do one or two things. First, tell me what you think of it -- what's confusing, what's good, what's bad, how it can be improved. Second, try to tell me as much as you can about what you think the setting, genre, plot, main characters, etc are going to be just based on this snippet. I'm sure it'll go through some more revision, but your feedback will be a helpful part of that process. Thanks!


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There aren't many dialogue tags -- was that confusing? Is there too much or too little exposition in terms of setting/etc? Is the dialogue believable?

The conversation's very top notch. There was only the very beginning that got me stumbling as well as this snippet

“Eh, forget I asked. Hey, did you hear something?”

“The wind off the plains, which howls with pain for its world devoid of rain.”

“Yeah, I meant over there.” He gestured deeper into the alley to a spilled stack of old crates.

But overall I'm intrigued by these tavern hoppers.