Blind I have been to have missed this delightful story.
There is one change possible. Take away the inverted commas from around the word 'checkmate'. The inverted commas make it appear she spoke the word aloud, and to speak aloud such words as 'check' and 'checkmate' is considered rude.
Thanks for reading, garza. Your feedback is always appreciated.
Removed the inverted commas.
“The greatest achievement was at first and for a time a dream. The oak sleeps in the acorn, the bird waits in the egg, and in the highest vision of the soul a waking angel stirs. Dreams are the seedlings of realities.” ~ James Allen
"Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." ~ Henry Van Dyke
This is one of the best reads I have had on amateur writers websites this year. Even though the 'chess' 'life' metaphor is now cliche, you manage to pull it off. Excellent work. I would really like to see this worked into a full story.
Thanks for the compliment, tunnel. And this is a full story.
“The greatest achievement was at first and for a time a dream. The oak sleeps in the acorn, the bird waits in the egg, and in the highest vision of the soul a waking angel stirs. Dreams are the seedlings of realities.” ~ James Allen
"Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best." ~ Henry Van Dyke
tunnel - We're not all amateurs, lad. I've made my way in this world for 71 years putting one word after another without ever having to go out and look for a job. And there are other such here, as well.
This story would suffer were anything more to be added.
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