Thread: Over the Moon. This is my shot at a fairy-tale. (Micro-Ficton. 392 words)

Over the moon and down the gully is where I live. Those are the directions that I give the people looking for my castle. My name is Angie, and I’m waiting for that perfect prince to satisfy my urges…

I can remember the last three princes’ that were given to me by my mother. My mother was only looking out for her legacy; she told me this every night before I slipped on my gown and crawled into bed. Feeling sorry for her; I decided that I would give it a try.


The first prince sticks out in my mind as a face riddled with pimples full of puss, ready to burst at the slightest touch. And his physique was poor for his age, only eighteen, and he couldn't even touch his toes. I enjoyed his company, though it was only a few months. Prince Edward was his name.


And when it came to dinner time, he was hysterical...


The second prince, I believe his name was, David. And he was like looking at a brick wall. His strength was amazing, and I liked that. I spent the most time with him than any of the others that claimed to make love to me.


David was honest when it came to loving me, and that was one thing that I admired about him. The other thing I admired was him having the strength to carry me to and fro.


And when it came to dinner time, he was quick to slit his throat...


For the third and lucky prince, George was him name. I made sure the cooks fed him properly every day of the week. My mother’s birthday was coming up, and she would not settle for anything other than... Something good that comes straight from the kitchen, and put on her plate.


So I had him eat the finest food that my kingdom had to offer, and I did all the work for him, including the hunting. I found it most entertaining when the animal would try to run from me. When the day of my mother’s birthday came; I started the fire and called her into the kitchen. And needless to say, she was happy with the transformation that he had undergone.


And when it came to dinner time, he screamed, oh yes he screamed...

You usually don't hear fairy tales in first person, so it was an interesting way of going about it. I gathered the gist that she was eating the princes, so the point got across, but I never quite understood the notion of 'fattening up' the people in fairy tales. Honestly, the second prince, being strong and muscular, would have tasted the best I'd think, fat isn't exactly good on meat. I usually cut it off...

One nit: They claimed that they made love to me.--- should be "They claimed that he made love to me." I believe. EDIT: or maybe I'm just reading the whole sentence wrong... I spent the most time with him than any of the others that claimed… They claimed that they made love to me. I think this whole sentence is just wonky. Fix it.

The one thing I don't quite get in the story however, is why prince 2 would snap his own neck. That doesn't quite make sense to me.

Fixed. And the fattening up of the princes? It was my take on a thanksgiving kind of thing. As for the second prince, he slit his throat instead.

I wasn't criticizing you in particular about the fattening up thing. Fairy tales have done that before, like in Hansel and Gretel, The witch fattened up Hansel to cook him. But what does feeding someone so they get fat do? it doesn't make more edible meat... It makes more fat that you'd just throw away, or maybe make into soap. The part of an animal, or in this case, human, that you'd eat is the muscle. So a more muscular dude would have more to good stuff to eat on him that the fat guy, even though the fat guy has more mass.

It's not a stab at your writing it's a stab at the phrase 'fattening up' cause it makes no goddamn sense, even in the case of the thanksgiving turkey. You want to make the turkey more tasty sure, you can feed it a good portion, but make it run on a treadmill every day or something.

I never got the 'fattening up' of the turkey either. The second prince was supposed to be a bitter taste, 'cause the princess liked him the most, but her mother has the urges. I'm working on making everything more clear.

Don't "quote" me on this but I have been told that when you "fatten up" livestock they are more tender. In other words if you feed them in excess for a couple of weeks the lean meat has a slightly higher fat content in it which makes it markedly more tender. I had a relative who complained about buying a prize winning steer, only to find the meat was tough. The reason was that during the auctioning process the cattle had not been fed well and started losing weight. That was the story anyway. The tender concept might support the last part.

Your post made me hungry. x.x