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Ephemeral_One

Anxieties of the modern self.... (Nonsensical rambling, really)

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I got my last paycheck from my former employer. That final bit of money that was the conversion of my vacation time into cash. That money that represented countless hours of not calling in, not leaving early and dedicating myself to the cause of the business. It tastes even more bitter than I figured it would but I have to take it to survive.

If I could afford to, I'd spit in the face of the disgusting bastards at the top who contribute less and less to positive change in the company. I'd punch out every self serving insect who is desperate to climb up the ranks more so than actually doing their job. And I'd thank every single soul who has to remain and endure who helped me get through the days. I only do the latter, obviously. As I can freely spend my words, such is the right I have in this country.

My biggest flaw in modern day, is my rather aloof nature in regards to money. Not that I frivolously spend it like so many of my contemporaries. But that what brings me joy of late, my minor decadence of escapism in video games are why I place any value on it at all. As I grow older, nearing my thirties now, the less and less appealing the modern materialism loses its luster. And when the cheap gold flakes off and the rose tinted glasses are shattered, what remains?

Ideas and ideals are discarded, like the plastic bag in the branches outside my bedroom window. 'Efficiency' and 'pride' seem to be poised at the center of all things. And I know I must return to the collar under another new company soon. This brief flirtation with peace in my days will be lost soon. Likely never to return, cause in the next thirty-six years I expect that corporate greed will become the values by which the 'plugged in' generations will become the norm. And I cannot help but worry that retirement will become naught but a memory of those of us who are old enough to remember it's bitter loss.

Still, one has to hold out hope and march on. Life is never as kind as we wish it to be nor as cruel as we'd make it out to be. I stole those words from my Goddess and I thank her for her donation.

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Comments

  1. Theglasshouse's Avatar
    Never think you are feeling lonely and you'll feel better in life. That's good then that someone did help you, so that's why people need family, and friends to help them get through life's obstacle course.
  2. kaminoshiyo's Avatar
    Some of those video games are SOOOOOO addictive, lol. Can't say how many times I've played Skyrim. AVOID Skyrim.

    But yeah, after 7000 years of civilization, the fact that there are greedy people at the top...the bottom...the left and the right...is no surprise by now. The frustration's a butch but at least you can start somewhere that isn't so toxic. That's probably the good thing, considering what stress can do to a person over time. Dust em off and move on.

    Hope all goes well, One.
  3. Ephemeral_One's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Theglasshouse
    Never think you are feeling lonely and you'll feel better in life.
    I'm sorry Glass, but that'd be just a lying to myself. I am lonely. Even when around others I can be lonely. I'll not lie to myself about that. It's learning to keep trying to connect even when you're afraid that I try to accomplish.
  4. Ephemeral_One's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by kaminoshiyo
    Some of those video games are SOOOOOO addictive, lol. Can't say how many times I've played Skyrim. AVOID Skyrim.

    But yeah, after 7000 years of civilization, the fact that there are greedy people at the top...the bottom...the left and the right...is no surprise by now. The frustration's a butch but at least you can start somewhere that isn't so toxic. That's probably the good thing, considering what stress can do to a person over time. Dust em off and move on.

    Hope all goes well, One.
    Thanks Kamino. I actually didn't like Skyrim as much as the earlier Elder scrolls but that's just me. My top picks for this year have been Nier: Automata and Persona 5. If you want excellent storytelling, Persona 5 is amazing. If you want an experience beyond just a videogame, Nier: Automata is a crafted masterpiece of high science fiction.
  5. James 剣 斧 血's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Ephemeral_One
    Thanks Kamino. I actually didn't like Skyrim as much as the earlier Elder scrolls but that's just me. My top picks for this year have been Nier: Automata and Persona 5. If you want excellent storytelling, Persona 5 is amazing. If you want an experience beyond just a videogame, Nier: Automata is a crafted masterpiece of high science fiction.

    I saw this on the activity feed and just had to say that Battlespire was clearly superior...