Thread: Gay, straight, lesbian bisexual people!

I have a couple simple questions; I want an honest open debate! No feelings hurt here.

Do most straight people become uncomfortable, around gay, lesbians and or bisexual people? Why?

Do gay and lesbians, and or bisexual people feel intimidated, by a predominantly straight society? Why?

Honest answers, with no hate …. just an open conversation! Perhaps we all can learn something.

In answer to your first question, I think that it depends a lot on where you are and who you hang out with. For my last couple years of highschool I was at a school for preforming arts. Everyone there loves the gay types, but when I lived in VA there were a lot more people who seemed to be uncomfortable or even openly hostile with, gays, bisexuals and lesbians.

As for the second I think its entirely personal. All you can really do is ask each individual their opinion. Again I would probably say it depends where you live. Somewhere like Philadelphia, where I live right now, most LBGT people seem perfectly at ease. If I lived down in Alabama though it would be another story.

Thats my take on it.

Originally Posted by R.R.Pearce

Do most straight people become uncomfortable, around gay, lesbians and or bisexual people? Why?

While I'm not uncomfortable around gay people myself I think the answer is yes (at least where I'm from, my town was appointed Sweden's least gay friendly community a few years back). As for the reason... I don't really know. Part of it is probably that some straight people (men mostly) think that gays (and especially gay sex) is disgusting and fear that gays will hit on them.
Jerry Seinfeld wrote something about it in his book Seinlanguage, basically that men feel that they are easily persuaded into buying useless crap against their will and if they spend time around gays they might end up being persuaded into having sex with them. It's not exactly a serious book but I think he's onto something.

Originally Posted by R.R.Pearce

Do gay and lesbians, and or bisexual people feel intimidated, by a predominantly straight society? Why?

Since I'm straight I can't exactly answer this but I imagine that most homosexuals probably doesn't have a problem with living in a predominantly straight society. A predominantly homophobic society (which too often seem to be the same) on the other hand...

(I really like parentheses)

I think the way men treat women reflects their stance on gays. Men who are always trying to have sex with women (or always have it on their mind when around women) subconsciously recognize this behavior and assume gays do the same thing, but with men. Even though that's stupid. I believe most gays don't try to "convert" straight men.

Hard question to answer. Being around gay people doesn't make me squeamish, or angry. To me, an openly gay person is someone who is lost to their sin. Never more so than today, where being gay is encouraged, even among those who claim to be Christian. I think I have a soft spot in my heart for gay people. I know that many really believe they were born gay, or that because they have amorous feelings toward men, it is natural for them to nurture and act upon them. But it makes me sad, because I want to let them know that God loves them, and wants to be Lord of their life, but that they will almost always reject him because of their homosexuality. There are many barriers to becoming reconciled to God, but I think homosexuality, because it becomes so ingrained into a person's ego, is one of the hardest to tear down. When most gay people believe that to abandon homosexuality would be to deny who they believe they are. So, uncomfortable? I think it would be more accurate to call the feeling helplessness.

I'm not usually uncomfortable around gay people. There are certain extremes I'd avoid--I wouldn't drink in a gay bar, for example.

Originally Posted by Kittenification

In answer to your first question, I think that it depends a lot on where you are and who you hang out with. For my last couple years of highschool I was at a school for preforming arts. Everyone there loves the gay types, but when I lived in VA there were a lot more people who seemed to be uncomfortable or even openly hostile with, gays, bisexuals and lesbians.

Originally Posted by Kittenification

As for the second I think its entirely personal. All you can really do is ask each individual their opinion. Again I would probably say it depends where you live. Somewhere like Philadelphia, where I live right now, most LBGT people seem perfectly at ease. If I lived down in Alabama though it would be another story.

Thats my take on it.

So it is local, I agree the more open the city is, that you live in, the more accepting everyone is of differences. I like your answers. Thanks.

I spent sometime in Minneapolis a few years back, I really liked the openness of the city towards its gay members, I have lived In SF as well…I moved home, back to Utah a few years ago … Utah is getting better, but it still has along way to go. I believe that people think inside tunnels sometimes.

Originally Posted by Faustling

While I'm not uncomfortable around gay people myself I think the answer is yes (at least where I'm from, my town was appointed Sweden's least gay friendly community a few years back). As for the reason... I don't really know. Part of it is probably that some straight people (men mostly) think that gays (and especially gay sex) is disgusting and fear that gays will hit on them.
Jerry Seinfeld wrote something about it in his book Seinlanguage, basically that men feel that they are easily persuaded into buying useless crap against their will and if they spend time around gays they might end up being persuaded into having sex with them. It's not exactly a serious book but I think he's onto something.


Since I'm straight I can't exactly answer this but I imagine that most homosexuals probably doesn't have a problem with living in a predominantly straight society. A predominantly homophobic society (which too often seem to be the same) on the other hand...

(I really like parentheses)

LOL, I know I have read that book, but it is untrue, I believe that if you have sex with a guy, that you must have at least thought about it, I mean I am a persuasive person, I don’t even think, I could make a truly straight man gay.

Not so much a hard time, sometimes we feel like second class people, I mean our whole lives are determined by the moral majority….I mean if Jill and Jason kiss in public, which is an accepted show of emotion. Yet if Carlos and I were to grab the other and kiss them, at least in Salt Lake, we would certainly turn a lot of heads, perhaps be arrested it has happened but that is another story.

Originally Posted by Hodge

I think the way men treat women reflects their stance on gays. Men who are always trying to have sex with women (or always have it on their mind when around women) subconsciously recognize this behavior and assume gays do the same thing, but with men. Even though that's stupid. I believe most gays don't try to "convert" straight men.

You are correct most gay men do not try to convert; you can’t convert someone that is not already at least thinking about it. I have gay friends that our delusional they want only the so called straights, let me tell you something, if your sleeping with a man, more then likely your not all the way straight.

I dated a return missionary a few years back. He was overly confused about his sexuality. He is now married and professing to be straight, that’s ok, if that is the way he has to live who am I? To judge, on the same toss of the coin, he spent months with me, telling me how much I meant to him, Yada, Yada, yada.. Now he judges me! I never sought him out, he found me going to the places I go to….but I am now the evil one….ok whatever LOL.

Originally Posted by Non Serviam

I'm not usually uncomfortable around gay people. There are certain extremes I'd avoid--I wouldn't drink in a gay bar, for example.

Well I can see your point, just like in the straight world; bars in general are a meeting ground for like minded people! Looking to hook up for a night of fun, I can really see your position.

Originally Posted by Kane

Hard question to answer. Being around gay people doesn't make me squeamish, or angry. To me, an openly gay person is someone who is lost to their sin.

Originally Posted by Kane

Why am I lost to my Sin?

Never more so than today, where being gay is encouraged, even among those who claim to be Christian. I think I have a soft spot in my heart for gay people. I know that many really believe they were born gay, or that because they have amorous feelings toward men, it is natural for them to nurture and act upon them.

So you are reaching out to the gay community, and offering what?

But it makes me sad, because I want to let them know that God loves them, and wants to be Lord of their life, but that they will almost always reject him because of their homosexuality.

I never rejected God, I rejected religion-and my religion rejected me! God did not reject me, man did.

There are many barriers to becoming reconciled to God, but I think homosexuality, because it becomes so ingrained into a person's ego, is one of the hardest to tear down. When most gay people believe that to abandon homosexuality would be to deny who they believe they are. So, uncomfortable? I think it would be more accurate to call the feeling helplessness.

Really I don’t feel helpless, I feel fulfilled of living the life I am supposed to live, and be the whole person that I am. No I am not helpless.

I know just like my older sister has told my mother, that she does not want to go to heaven, and not have her brother their with her….That makes me feel sad, that a religion would cause my sister such pain…It is not me that causes her pain, it is her beliefs that I am going to burn, that tortures her thoughts. I am sorry I can’t stop being who I am not even for my sister and her pain.

Ray

Why am I lost to my Sin?

You wear your sin like a badge of honor, it is your source of identity.

I never rejected God, I rejected religion-and my religion rejected me! God did not reject me, man did.

Rejecting religion is fine, but if you have not accepted Jesus Christ into your heart, then you have rejected God.

Really I don’t feel helpless, I feel fulfilled of living the life I am supposed to live, and be the whole person that I am. No I am not helpless.

No, you are not helpless, and neither am I, though at times I feel that way. Getting through to someone who is convinced they are right is nearly impossible.

I am sorry I can’t stop being who I am not even for my sister and her pain.

Being homosexual is not something you are, it's something you do. There is no sex in Heaven, no marriage. To identify yourself by your sexual preference is a level of living in the flesh that is rivaled by little else. Your fleshly desires shape who you are, your sense of worth. Christ calls us to die to ourselves, and to be born again in Him.

But really, a debate forum is no place for this discussion, though it seems destined to repeat itself over and over again. PM me if you want, or don't, I'm not going to continue this convo here though.

Originally Posted by Kane

But really, a debate forum is no place for this discussion, though it seems destined to repeat itself over and over again. PM me if you want, or don't, I'm not going to continue this convo here though.

Why wouldn't a debate forum be the place for a debate regarding homosexuality and religion? Sure, it might be a bit of topic in this particular thread (but then again, almost all debate threads goes horribly off topic after a while) but it would certainly fit the forum.

Originally Posted by R.R.Pearce

LOL, I know I have read that book, but it is untrue, I believe that if you have sex with a guy, that you must have at least thought about it, I mean I am a persuasive person, I don’t even think, I could make a truly straight man gay.

Yeah, I know it isn't true but I doubt everyone thinking like that knows it.
Something straight guys "fearing" homosexuals should think about is that for every gay guy there is less competition for the heterosexual women. (Of course, for every lesbian there is also less women to compete for but guys mostly have a problem with the male homosexuals.)

Originally Posted by R.R.Pearce

Not so much a hard time, sometimes we feel like second class people, I mean our whole lives are determined by the moral majority….I mean if Jill and Jason kiss in public, which is an accepted show of emotion. Yet if Carlos and I were to grab the other and kiss them, at least in Salt Lake, we would certainly turn a lot of heads, perhaps be arrested it has happened but that is another story.

I admit that I would react stronger if two guys kissed each other then if a man and a women did (if two girls kiss each other I would react the strongest but that's another story... ), not because I would find anything wrong with it but simply because it's very rare. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen that happen in public (except for two straight guys kissing each other on a dare).
You can get arrested for kissing a guy in Salt Lake City? Man, those Mormons are weird. They used to be okay with numerous wives but won't accept someone kissing one guy.

Im comfortable around gay people as im bisexual myself, and several of our friends are either gay or bi. its never caused any problem to me.

Kane im sorry but i think your post is so wrong, but to attack it would be to attack your religion so i'll just agree to disagree.

Originally Posted by Kane

You wear your sin like a badge of honor, it is your source of identity.

I do please tell me how, I am eager to know?

Rejecting religion is fine, but if you have not accepted Jesus Christ into your heart, then you have rejected God.

Hmm' could you please tell me when Christ said, being gay was a sin! I don't think I have ever read where he said that? Are we not under Grace, not law.

No, you are not helpless, and neither am I, though at times I feel that way. Getting through to someone who is convinced they are right is nearly impossible.

But I am going to parish and burn in Hell, I living for Satan Correct? Is that your underlining reason for wanting to save me?

Being homosexual is not something you are, it's something you do. There is no sex in Heaven, no marriage. To identify yourself by your sexual preference is a level of living in the flesh that is rivaled by little else. Your fleshly desires shape who you are, your sense of worth. Christ calls us to die to ourselves, and to be born again in Him.

I am gay so it's a choice? Like choosing the correct pair of shoes, with the suit I am wearing....Ok today I choose to be with a woman...even if it is wrong to tie her life up...Or I am to remain alone...and celibate...I am going home this morning and tell Carlos, thank you for the last decade...but I choose not to be gay anymore...It wont happen! I am GAY. You see it’s not a sexual thing per say….I truly love Carlos…as you love your spouse…

But really, a debate forum is no place for this discussion, though it seems destined to repeat itself over and over again. PM me if you want, or don't, I'm not going to continue this convo here though.

I really still agree to disagree… I have to say something in your defense, you are strong in your opinions, and you have not attacked me personally. I respect you and your feelings, as I stated this is a friendly exchange of Ideas…
Ray

Originally Posted by wyf

Im comfortable around gay people as im bisexual myself, and several of our friends are either gay or bi. its never caused any problem to me.

Kane im sorry but i think your post is so wrong, but to attack it would be to attack your religion so i'll just agree to disagree.

I love this woman, see Kane I love this woman! LOL I really do

Originally Posted by Faustling

Why wouldn't a debate forum be the place for a debate regarding homosexuality and religion? Sure, it might be a bit of topic in this particular thread (but then again, almost all debate threads goes horribly off topic after a while) but it would certainly fit the forum.



Yeah, I know it isn't true but I doubt everyone thinking like that knows it.
Something straight guys "fearing" homosexuals should think about is that for every gay guy there is less competition for the heterosexual women. (Of course, for every lesbian there is also less women to compete for but guys mostly have a problem with the male homosexuals.)



I admit that I would react stronger if two guys kissed each other then if a man and a women did (if two girls kiss each other I would react the strongest but that's another story... ), not because I would find anything wrong with it but simply because it's very rare. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen that happen in public (except for two straight guys kissing each other on a dare).
You can get arrested for kissing a guy in Salt Lake City? Man, those Mormons are weird. They used to be okay with numerous wives but won't accept someone kissing one guy.

Thank you! I think I like your way of thinking!

Originally Posted by Kane

Rejecting religion is fine, but if you have not accepted Jesus Christ into your heart, then you have rejected God.

So can we take it that's a big God-fearing NO to trying out Gay Sex once in your life?

Originally Posted by Pete_C

So can we take it that's a big God-fearing NO to trying out Gay Sex once in your life?

I am an advocate to whatever floats your boat Pete. You and you alone must decide, when you do please call 555-5555….0r 666-6666.LOL Only Pete