|
Flash fiction - Jimmy tries to make a sale (203 words)
Jimmy rode his bike for half a mile down Washington Lane before he finally came to a house where the residence of average humans appeared feasible. An incredibly old woman answered when Jimmy knocked.
“What do you have there?” she asked in the best impression of a talking crow Jimmy had ever seen.
“My name is Jimmy Weston and I’m from Billingsworth Hills Elementary. I am raising money for my school by offering great holiday gift selections to the fine members of my community. I have a catalog here for you to browse, and I am certain you will find something you and the whole family can enjoy. Would you like to take a look?” The speech went brilliantly.
“Huh?” She cawed.
Jimmy repeated the speech. The woman farted.
“What do you have there?” she asked.
Jimmy gave her the catalog and told her he was selling candy, a very simplified version of his over-rehearsed speech.
“This is for the school?” The old woman flipped through the magazine and preened herself for twelve full minutes.
“Did you find anything you like?” Jimmy asked.
The old woman stuck out her neck and twisted her head upside down.
“I don’t have any money right now.”
|
