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Old 10-14-2007, 07:40 PM   #1
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Based on an untold scene in the novel, "The Great Gatsby". I know there really isn't ANY character dialog, but if there's anything else that can be improved, please critique. Furthermore, revision and proofreading would be much obliged. Thanks.





Daisy and Tom were sitting opposite each other at the kitchen table, with a plate of cold fired chicken between them and two bottles of ale. Daisy had her head bowed, as if in prayer, with tombstones lurking within her eyes. Her face was a pale white, and her hair was matted to her forehead in an angry tangle. Tom, meanwhile, was seeking an answer to an unanswerable question; he looked at Daisy blankly, as if hoping to see something to make what had happened escape his mind. The red and black velvet tablecloth shimmered under the fading candle light, as the wax melted slowly to its near end.

“George’s wife, Myrtle…” Tom trailed off, leaving the thought behind. “They say it was a yellow car…”

“People say a lot of things Tom.” Daisy suddenly replied. Her head shifted up, leveling her eyes with his. Anger, frustration, and fear trickled from her grey face. A tear gathered in her eye and slowly found its way down her cheek. “Sometimes people say things they don’t believe themselves”.

“How many damn people do you know with a yellow clown car in this town?” Tom spat forcefully. “It was your little friend Gatsby there, not giving a care about anybody! He’s as blind as a bat! You ought to be ashamed of yourself, trying to cover him for this! He’s not worth it Daisy. You don’t love him, and you never did.” Tom stood to his feet with a great presence and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him, rattling the China in the nearby buffet and hutch.

Daisy stood slowly to her feet and snuffed out the remaining candle. The smoke curled its way into the gloomy shadows, throwing a thin veil of gray across the already darkened room. She crossed the room to the large living room window and peered out into the night. Laying her hand gently against the windowpane, she pulled the curtains back, revealing the pale moonlight masked by the white peppered sky. The moonlight hit the far road just right, and revealed a small silhouette hidden behind a collage of fall-faded trees. “I’m sorry” she whispered, looking away from the window. A single car passed on the ghostly road rumbling into the far distance, forcing Daisy to peer back out into the solemn murkiness of the night. Stopping at a red light, the car jumped to a stop. As the light turned green and the car sped away, Daisy turned her attention back to the shadowy figure. “I really am”.
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Old 10-16-2007, 08:04 PM   #2
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