Today's Society - Page 2 - WritingForums.com - Writing Forums, Writing Challenges, Critiques and Help for Writers

Kermie04 · 07-11-2004, 09:32 AM

Jack~

thanx

sully474 · 07-11-2004, 01:34 PM

Truth is, it sounds a bit too much like a crazed rant to really be taken seriously by all people. SOme will look into it, and agree with you, but others would call you a nutter. You should express your feelings about it in a more straightforward manner, so that when it is looked at everybody can see that you know excactly what you are talking about.

Airborneguy · 07-11-2004, 03:06 PM

"all up in his face"? If you cannot handle criticism of your work, do not post it to be criticised. My first post had nothing to do with you, it was a general thought about the topic you wrote on. Then I am told to not be taken seriously. Then, when I give you a critique on what you wrote, a very honest and devoid of attack critique (okay, I added one little joke at the end to make my point). Then, I am told I live in a bubble (the bubble called NYC, hmmm...), then...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack Wyvern

I just don't want Kermie to feel like he has to back down from Airbourne just because he got "all up in his face" about it.

Sounds like Kermie was able to handle it.

//*Gives Kermie a round of golf claps//*

What is this? What warranted a "all up in his face"? Did I's bes speakin' like dis? And there is no "handling" of it. If you cannot face the criticism of people who do not agree with you, don't post. I think you should re-read what I wrote before someone tells me I was "handled".

Jack Wyvern · 07-11-2004, 06:18 PM

Why do you feel threatened? You had your say, Airbourne.

Quote:

After re-reading, you have done nothing more than take some simple problems and make them into an earth shattering culmination of events which will bring upon the fall of humanity a little faster.

Please... a little less on the melodrama.

I think you are the one who continues to blow this whole thing out of proportion.

Quote:

Someone who really wants to make a statement about the so called "ills" of society, should focus on more important matters, not "who's ma baby daddy?"

I didn't read where Kermie asked you what you thought was important.

Quote:

You did nothing other than get worked up over a show you watched (which is exactly what they want to happen) and then write about it.

Which is exactly what you are doing right now. What happened? Did the bubble burst? I thought you weren't one of those people who needed to force their views on everyone else.

Quote:

What is this? What warranted a "all up in his face"? Did I's bes speakin' like dis?

"Up in your face" is a widely acceptable phrase for describing the actions of someone who is overreacting to a situation and no longer engendered to any specific ethnicity.

Quote:

I think you should re-read what I wrote before someone tells me I was "handled".

I read your comments and mine stand as I wrote them. Kermie handled the situation well by not allowing your bullying to bother him. What little useful information that could be gleened from your ranting post was over run by the attack on Kermies belief that this is an unimportant topic.

Quote:

Then, I am told I live in a bubble (the bubble called NYC, hmmm...), then...

The bubble I spoke of is not NYC, although I did find it rather distasteful every time I was there, but of that idyllic world in which you and your family live.

Quote:

I only know about 3 people like that, and they all live in my house...

My point was, if you truly believe that you are somehow sheltered from the degradation of society, your living in a bubble...and sadly mistaken.

Since I don't feel the need to hijack Kermie's post any more than we already have, and since I've said as much as I want to say about this...
Oh man... can't we all just get along?

Oopgrub · 07-11-2004, 10:03 PM

No one is innocent.

Airborneguy · 07-12-2004, 03:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack Wyvern

The bubble I spoke of is not NYC, although I did find it rather distasteful every time I was there, but of that idyllic world in which you and your family live.

My point was, if you truly believe that you are somehow sheltered from the degradation of society, your living in a bubble...and sadly mistaken.

Woah pal, you went a little too far here. You insult my fucking family? What the fuck is wrong with you? Sheltered from society? I see more shit EVERY day, as a police officer on the streets of Brooklyn, then you will ever see in your entire life. Ever seen someone stick the end of a frying pan in their babies ass because it won't stop crying? Ever seen someone rape their sister because she won't shut up? Ever seen a dead body, so burnt, that it looks like a pig at a pig roast? You call me sheltered?

Oh yeah, since you completely mis-read my previous posts, I feel the need to add: I have seen all of that, and might again tomorrow. The "degradation of society happpens to be my workplace, backyard, and playground all at the same time. I SEE the new "degradations" before you even HEAR of them. And I believe (or at least hope) you know that you can't refute that statement...

YOU inflamed this situation. All I did was offer an opinion of what I was reading, I IN NO WAY attacked the person who wrote it, and now you are insulting my family? Who the fuck do you think you are?

If you post something here, it might be criticised. Please, from now on, state that you do not want negative criticism, only compliments. I can't wait to hear the negative stuff when my book comes out, so that I can improve myself. Again, RE-READ everything, except this, that I wrote. I offerred nothing more than my honest opinion of what this person wrote. You can't take the criticism: DON'T POST.

Airborneguy · 07-12-2004, 04:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack Wyvern

What little useful information that could be gleened from your ranting post was over run by the attack on Kermies belief that this is an unimportant topic.

Where the hell did I attack anyone (Other than asking you who the fuck you think you are once you insulted my family)?

Oh, and you seem to have messed up your own point. I thought I was the one who felt this was unimportant. Here you say it's Kermie. Who is it? You seem confused...

Jack Wyvern · 07-12-2004, 06:52 AM

First. You brought your family into this, not me. The "bubble" I spoke of was a metaphor about someone being able to live without influencing or being influenced by others. Obviuosly you took exception to that. If I meant to insult your family, I would have done it in a much clearer way. Since I didn't, and you simply misconstrued the meaning of a poorly worded metaphor, then I apologize for making you 'think' that your family was being insulted. Strange how perception becomes reality these days.

Being a cop in NYC is an admirable occupation, but I'm not going to bend over and kiss your ass for it. True, you may see more 'shit' on a daily basis than I do, but that doesn't invalidate everyone eles's opinions but yours. You aren't the only one who has seen what people can do to each other.

I inflamed this situation. Yes. It's called 'Freedom of Speech'. One of those rights you are swron to protect and serve, if I remember correctly.

If that is your idea of constructive criticism, then I apologize for thinking you were simply being an arrogant ass. For some reason, I thought critiques were more than trivialising the point the author was trying to make. But you are a NYC cop, so you have that right.

Your right about my mistake. It was your belief that this was an unimportant issue that was an attack on Kermie. Thanks for pointing that out to me.
//*Gives Airborneguy golf claps //*

Well... do you need to take a pill or something? You seem stressed.

Kermie04 · 07-12-2004, 08:59 AM

EVERYBODY JUST STOP FIGHTING!!!!!!!

If I knew this was going to start this big of a controversy I wouldn't have posted it. However, everybody has a difference of opinion and different views. I accept everybody's point of view and opinion. We are not here to trample all over each other. I appreciate all the advice that I get here, good and bad, how else are we to improve our writing?

Airborneguy · 07-12-2004, 12:38 PM

Hey kermie, I just offerred my opinion, that is the reason something gets posted here. Look above, the fine fellow said it himself that he inflamed this situation because he could. I had no intention whatsoever of fighting. I am still being attacked as you can tell from the post. I never wanted to make you think you or your writing style were being attacked in any way. I never said you were a bad writer, I just didn't think the topic was important.

Let me explain: Your title is Today's Society. You then proceed to use a few examples of "problems" to highlight what is wrong with today's society. Well, the "who's my daddy..." thing, is not a major problem of society. That is why I said you got worked up over the show (which you actually said) and then wrote this piece. I believe that you could have thought a little more and come up with a more influencial argument, that's all.

Oh, and since I was told that you never asked for my opinion on the importance of this... I must admit I was under the impression that this is a critiqueing forum, and that anything posted here may be critiqued in any manner. From now on, I will most definately limit what I say to not offend the writer. I have always found that this is the best way to help someone improve themselves...

deanothewriter · 07-12-2004, 12:42 PM

Hey, here's a different perspective on the subject of talk shows. I once had a friend who contacted the Jerry Springer show and was offerd $500 to appear on his show. So you see, the'll pay you to appear, and tell a nice big fat lie too. Anybody can tell a story, right?
Deano-the-Writer

Airborneguy · 07-12-2004, 08:24 PM

My uncle did it once, not Springer, some dating show, totally fake. But, another uncle went on Sally Jesse, and they were joking, and of course going for the drama, but true.

Kermie04 · 07-12-2004, 09:12 PM

talk shows suck, and while it inspired my writing, it wasn't really waht it was focused on, I just watned to touch on the problems in the world.

deanothewriter · 07-13-2004, 02:00 AM

Yes Kermie, they really do SUCK!!!

But honestly, is there anbody that would take the $500 to be on TV?

Think about it...

Kermie04 · 07-13-2004, 07:50 AM

Yea, true, I dont know anybody who would turn down $500 to be on a talk show. However, although most of the talk shows are exaggerated, the problems that are discussed do occur in real life, maybe not to the extent that they are portrayed on talk shows, but they are a part of life. I guess with the writing I wanted to get across that these problems do exsist and that we need to be aware of them. The writing was inspired by the talk show, but it had also been something that I had been thinking about, the talk show just gave me the push to write about it.