Kermie04

This was part of the song lyric challenge in the writing challenge section; but I thought I would post it here to because I really want to finish this but am having a lot of trouble!

I just graduated from college and I wanted this piece (challenge) to be based on graduating and starting a new life. This is what I was able to come up with but I don't know how to finish it or how to make it not suck as much. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

There's a time a for joy, a time for tears
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
And oh how the years go by
And life is a road and I want to keep going, love is a river and I want keep flowing, life is road now and forever, what a wonderful journey.

Take a walk in the park when you feel down
Shout with open eyes (to the miracle of life)
Imagine there's no heaven

Csira

"And life is a road and I want to keep going, love is a river and I want keep flowing, life is road now and forever, what a wonderful journey. "

This reminds me of the song: "At the Beginning" by Richard Marx and Donna Lewis. The lyrics are very closely related.

The first stanza starts off alright, but the second stanza seems out of place. I am unsure as to how it fits as to the first. Or maybe it's just that I'm extremely tired. I'm sorry that I cannot be of much help. ^^;

~Csira

__________________
Without Hope, there is no existence.

To be wanted, to be accepted
Is that not our heart's desire?

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Kermie04

Hey~

Thanx for replying. The second stanza fits with the first (in my opinion) because of the line

The second stanza is talking about how life is a wonderful journey. Like the things that I have mentioned are what makes life a wonderful journey. I hope I explained that properly. Thanx for your help. I hope I was able to help you!

Cora Windover

wow a lot of these are lines from songs... "Oh How the Years Go By", I think that's Amy Grant o_O may be wrong, anyway it's a good song.... that life is a road thing is from "At the Beginning"... however, I think it's like an allusion - it heightens the effect of the piece by having those stolen lines in there (I use stolen loosely, I don't mean to undermine your lyrics).

Huh. I dunno, I'll read over it a bit more later... it's kind of late now... *zonk* zzzzzzzzzz......

__________________
Your father may be father to all the boys, but still...
He's not the man who sired you; so marry who ye will.

Proliffick ~.^

Kermie04

Hey thanks for the repley.

The lines are from actual songs. I should have mentioned that. It was from a challenge from the challenge board. I just want to finish it but don't where to take it so I thought I would post it here to get some feedback on how I can complete the challenge.