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im at an impasse with this one any suggestions
She came to the night like a wild mare racing across the hills and fields of the mother earth, transcending time and space to visit me in my dreams. Her face shown silver with the light of the moon as her eyes rolled with the blue waves of the ocean. Her hair was golden, reminding me of the wheat fields of my home. A hazy halo of stardust blazed from within her ethereal tresses. The robes that adorned her body were fluid with the elements of life. They seemed to radiate a mystical power, enlightening me to sounds of the universe.
She stood at the end of my bed one moment and was at my ear in the next, whispering words of comfort and wisdom, offering me solace with her gentle tone and intriguing words. “Come to me, when u r in need. Ask the wind to carry your words to my world. You shall not be alone; I am your guidance, the poet of your soul and the souls of all mankind. Release your power onto me and together we shall channel that strength into the breathe of fire and life, the air and sea.” Her fingers grazed my cheek, a trail of heat marking their path. They stopped, lingering just above my lips, “The true love resides inside of you. Look within yourself for the answers that you seek and they will be there, lying in wait for the right moment to make themselves known. Call to me when the song illuminates your being and I will come. In your own time, your journey into the light shall begin. Know that you need never be afraid because at your side I’ll always be.” In a moment of calm she retreated to the shadows only to be enhanced by the moonbeams shining through the window. Her light was known, her spirit felt. As I pulled myself into an upright position she faded, becoming one in the prism of night. All light and music followed her into the midnight sky, diminishing like a dying star. I was left baffled and bereaved, wondering at the divine faery that left me no name.
The thought came in a sudden flash of lightning. The answer echoed in a brief whistle of the wind, Laiste! I am Laiste! The subtle voice captivated my mind. Sleep became a hopeless endeavor. Questions came rushing at me from every corner and forgotten passageway in my mind. Memories of my younger years, when I had felt those stirrings of energy around and inside of me. The dreams in the night of forbidden and sometimes frightening powers. I locked them away, passing them off as my own furtive imagination. I had been taught well to ignore what isn’t understood, a rule that I had never quite gotten down. My inner world had been rich and vibrant with questions, seeking a higher understanding of life, what came before me and what would follow.
I am told I was a difficult child, but perhaps it was just that they didn’t have the answers, didn’t have the courage to open their minds to the elusive song of the universe, too afraid of what the truth might bring. A shattering of the core beliefs leaves u shaking and vulnerable, lost in a sea of possibilities. So few people want to explore their own souls to find the pathway to happiness, content to stay in the familiar no matter how miserable they are. They don’t want the answers because to have them would mean to acknowledge their own faults and mistakes. When did it become such a blasphemy to make mistakes, they are essential to our own personal evolution. Our faults make us who we are, it’s for us to correct them or learn to live with them.
I need to know, need to explore that world. For too long I’ve remained stagnant, letting myself slip into their way, suffocating with self inflicted limitations. It had been an eternity since a faery had visited me, awake or asleep. The message was too blatant to ignore. The time for my quest to begin had arrived.
The week that followed her visit I wandered around in a dreamlike state. I seemed to be floating, my body moving mechanically while my mind turned over and over, searching for what I wasn’t sure. My mind’s eye was bringing forth so many recollections of the past, haunting me with the pain they conveyed. At night I lie awake hoping for another glimpse of my faery. At times as I succumbed to sleep I was sure I could hear the lilting melody of a flute lulling me into euphoria. My dreams were vivid and confusing. Often I found myself standing at the threshold of one door or another always unable to pass through. As my frustration mounted, I would wake, sweaty and shaken, tears streaming from my eyes unfettered. I felt lost, not sure where I stood or where I was going. My life seemed to be a revolving door, trapped between disorientation , fear and pain. Laiste had unlocked something inside me the night she came. Something that at times, I wished had remained hidden. Lack of sleep made me irritable and irresponsible. My family and friends began to question me. I had no answers for my behavior and I could hardly tell anyone that a faery had visited me. It seemed chaos ruled my mind and I hadn’t the power to rein it in.
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