Industrial

Hi Nykimbur, I am a editor from publishing house looking at this forum for great potential writers. Just from reading you're snippet we here at Publishing house are greatly interested in you're piece and think it has great potential.

Please contact me at once at jackbeatmcdick@gmail.com and hopefully we can work something else out.

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That's just more ammo for my arsenal.

Nykimbur

Here's some more excerpts:

I don’t know what happened to Molly. She used to be such an inspired character when I created her. She came about in those turbulent times around October after I’d lost my novel, a year’s hard work, after I’d decided my ending, just when I’d got the internet and our SAT’s were approaching, Red alert and The living daylights and my RS project on the Dalai Lama, and Textiles bag making shit, and the Kerrang! Album, when I was still mildly interested in Sailor Moon and I discovered the wide world of the internet and Sailor Saturn, my new muse after the quickly scrapped Sailor Moon, the messiah of death, who I would centre an entire novel around. It would be dark, so dark, a darkness I grasped so easily as a writer then, when my buzz was still active yet fading so fast. . .

Oh, how rich, to weave a being’s life at will! Also, of course you people can know what love feels like, of course you can feel the awe of natural beauty, human consciousness, the beauty of the universe, but have you ever wondered what the princess feels like when she has been rescued from the dragon? Have you ever wondered what it feels like to wander through an enchanted forest, and meet societies of wondrous creatures? Have you ever wandered what magic really feels like? Of course you haven’t. You know what this all feels like. It’s silly kid’s ignorance. It means nothing, compared to the wonders of the real world. This is why I feel so sad, because this is all that will be seen by most people when I try to explain this: a sickly sweet, suffocating, undesirable fairytale world, which is completely wrong. It’s starting to feel wrong trying to bring the true meaning and happiness of magical worlds into this one because this horribly restricted world can’t express it, but the ironic thing is that it’s exactly like a fairy tale; the way a fairy tale should be, the way fantasy, and life should be lived: with magic. It’s just so beyond this world it’s incomprehensible. That’s the sentence I’ve been looking for all these years. This world feels like nothing more than the last, dead, insubstantial thread of the once great, magical, multicoloured carpet of creation. It’s nothing, but no-one really cares.

I’m not stupid, I’m not crazy, I’m not mentally unstable, I’m just preoccupied.

My writing has consumed me.

I only started really playing videogames when I was 9, which was a real shame, but that first year made up for everything, man. Lovely 3+ Mario games, beat-em-ups, side scrolling SNES classics. Cutest year of my life.

-I speak through my thinking. I think through my writing. I don’t talk.

It seems all we really have left is imagination. I feel so hopeless, so - nothing. I feel insecure. Too focused. I can’t explain it. I have been caught up in the degradation of humanity, like everyone else. I have to make the best of it. Everything I see which really means something, which makes this world non-existent, is so little here. So nothing. So focused. Fantasy. Attributed to our imaginations. Summed up in one word, a word which means nothing; hallucination, fancy, the free play of creative imagination, imaginative fiction. It means everything to me. How can I explain it? This is my darkest side.

END EXCERPTS

All of the above represents barely a fraction of my bio, so keep that in mind.

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2.0

I have read my fair share of online journals. In all honesty, the only significant difference I see between you and them is a good portion of bloggers are self-depricating, while you seem to be quite pompous.

Maybe instead of telling us how much better you are, you should show us. What you have posted thus far doesn't lend any weight to your claim.

And going back to your most recent excerpt. Unlike the first one, I did have to force myself to get all the way through it. It starts with an uninteresting run-on sentence, progresses to a flat, uninteresting middle, and ends with an (yet again) uninteresting, somewhat emo-scented conclusion.

So, going back to your original question:

As it has been stated multiple times in this thread, "No."

The post limit on this forum is 20,000 characters. How about you use an entire post to showcase an excerpt of your bio, so we can read things in context rather than just bits and pieces, or show us the some of novel you've been writing. I could talk about my brilliance all day, but it won't mean anything to you unless I show you; otherwise it's just pissing into the wind.

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Don't you know there ain't no devil, there's just god when he's drunk
-Tom Waits

Nykimbur

That excerpt was from early on in the bio, when my style wasn't as good. My writing becomes better over the years, so readers can see how I matured as a writer and a person when they read the whole bio.

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Necromortis

Every single complaint that is raised, you come up with an excuse or reason why the rest of the book is better.

Sad fact of the matter is, unless these people know you, and/or want to know all about your life story, they're not going to sit around through a 'badly written/bad style' beginning so they see how you've matured as a writer and a person.

If you really want to do this, take your 600,000 word bio, which sounds just about like a diary (as it was written over the years as the events actually happen), and re-write the damn thing. Only taking the interesting parts. Making sure everything has a solid style and is well-written.

Or you could listen to everyone here who says they wouldn't read a mostly teenage biography because there's nothing interesting in it. Interesting to you, maybe. Interesting to the rest of the fucking planet, not so much.

~Christian

Nykimbur

We'll see about that.

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Dan

Your post seemed incomplete.

Anyway, learn how to take criticism, especially when you request it. Just as importantly, learn how to take advice from people who know a whole lot more than you do.

Or don't. I really couldn't give a shit at this point. I'm still in this thread solely for the comedy.

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And while you're there, check out my ongoing serial Addicted: http://www.panicwriter.com/fountainpen/id5.html

valeca

Me thinks there's a collective chain being yanked here.

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"...make your own nature, not the advice of others, your guide in life." --Pythia, Oracle of Apollo at Delphi

I'm here.

edropus

I began to suspect, right around the 'This proves that my writing is better then the average', that this was all a joke meant to get to people. It's very rare to meet such an unrealistic, delusional case of self deception. I stuck with that belief until the signature was added, which is the definitive 'I'm a roleplayer' signature. At that point the situation lost clarity, as said attitude is pretty common among that group.

For someone so impressed with his writing, he hasn't posted more then a few hundred words at a time. At this point my guess is he's either lying about the length, can't find anything more then a few hundred words that he's willing to post, or is just really uncommitted to this joke.

Dan

That was my other suspicion. I honestly can't tell. If so, bravo!

__________________
Let it Flow at Fountain Pen: http://www.panicwriter.com/fountainpen/

And while you're there, check out my ongoing serial Addicted: http://www.panicwriter.com/fountainpen/id5.html

Nykimbur

Okay, here's the prologue, and that's all you're getting:


























Writer’s block. It begins with the question every writer dreads. What do I write when I can’t write?
The answer: An autobiography. The subject you know better than anyone else. It may not be pretty, but damnit, it’s writing! Let’s get one thing straight, first thing: This isn’t just some diary or blog, I wrote this because I was having trouble writing anything else. As a writer, this bio was my main focus for most of five years. As such, you’ll find it’s somehwat above average for a non-fiction piece or general diary. This is essentially a failsafe, a fallback for writing. It’s big, excessive and less refined than a work of fiction. It’s not necessarily my best work, but it does the job.
Having written and lost my first major novel by the age of thirteen, I was anxious to start again in the same vein of fantasy I was developing, based on videogame and cartoon worlds. However, due to shifting religions and the subsequent loss of TV, as well as of course the heavy loss of my previous novel, I found myself losing inspiration in my daily life, a key facet of fiction of which loss of can and did lead to fatal results: Writer’s Meltdown.
Before I continue, here’s my list of general rules for good writing:




(1) The majority of your work must be fiction- Fiction is true writing, writing expressed in its fullest form. If you’re writing mostly non-fiction or poetry, you’re not a real writer, with exceptions for the occasional in-depth study.
(2) You must write protagonists of both sexes- Writing a protagonist of your own sex is simple enough, writing a protagonist of the opposite sex displays true talent.
(3) Remember the three fundamentals of writing: Reflection – Inspiration – Imagination- All three are required for fiction, only one is required for non-fiction, hence my term for it: Lopsided Writing.
(4) A good writer is always writing. Lack of writing indicates unbalanced fundamentals- Conversely, constant writing can be unbalanced but good. See the exception to (1).
(5) A fertile life is the key to a fertile imagination- Don’t isolate yourself.

This book is the exception to the rules. It comprises the majority of my work over the last five years, yet it’s non-fiction, the protagonist is me, I’m mainly using only one of the three fundamentals: Reflection, I’m writing constantly, yet unbalancedly, and I’ve become increasingly isolated over the last five years. So how, considering these factors, have I produced a good piece of work? The answer again is that this is an autobiography, the one area of writing which I’ve found has the tendency to turn conventional rules on their head.
By my tenth school year, the best I could manage was a short creative writing piece for GCSE coursework called The Teddy Bear Robber, which was deemed genius but too long, and had to be severely edited for the piece I handed in the next year. It was around this time near the end of year 10 that I began this autobiographical diary. I was inventing imaginary lovers and experiencing mind-bending visions (which had gotten markedly stronger at least a year prior to starting the bio). My fiction was becoming reality.[A1] Going into my eleventh year, with GCSE’s looming and a romantic infatuation with a cartoon character, I found my fiction increasingly slowing down under the weight of my own burdens. But where my fiction was declining, my non-fiction was heavily gathering pace. And so began my five-year foray into self-reflection…

Oh, to be 15 again. OK, this autobiography; part diary; basically consists of my extremist political, spiritual, psychological and philosophical views, a lot of venting and what I make of my multilayered life, as I mention later on. As I also mention, I suppose the best way to describe me would be an extremely schizotypal person who likes to write. In a word, schizotypal would be me, in the most professional sense. I’m quite random a lot of the time, bear with it, I’m trying my best to structure my thoughts.
I’m looking into Raja Yoga, the religion my family’s changed to about two years ago (which I strongly advise you to research for the sake of this book); I’m still not quite sure if I follow it, but for the time being, I’ll live and talk by their beliefs, one of the things I’m finding difficult to come to terms with though is the celibacy. Baba’s what we call God in my religion. I do believe in past lives and karma independently because I think and feel too complexly to be a child. I am apparently nearing the end of my cycle of rebirths in this world and I would like to leave a tribute to the dying world. If you wish to fully understand everything I’m talking about, please research further into certain videogames, movies, cartoons, beliefs etc. I refer to the past in school years a lot, especially year 8, which in normal years is the latter half of 2000 and former half of 2001, so when you see ‘year 8’ just think ‘2000 to 2001’. Alright, let’s see how long I can take this.
At the time of writing, it’s four days to my sixteenth birthday, but I have compiled over 31,000 words of my autobiography already. My life has been very strange, but almost normal, relatively. I like to write. My interests also include Anime and videogames. In my beliefs, I am almost 5000 years old and this is my, and most likely your, last life before time repeats itself again. To get some things straight, the world is 5000 years old, and it used to be a very wonderful place. I’ve had some good times in this life, which I’m glad of, seeing the state the world’s in now. Oh yeah, I hate Graphics technology for GCSE. Me and some guys only chose it in year 9 because we thought it was something to do with computers. Well, the beginning part of this bio is just a bunch of notes I wrote down about a year ago when I started this. I’d prefer to leave them as they are, so a short parenthesis before each one if it’s required; I’ll give some background, but bear with a lot of it. The Golden Age is the time of heaven on earth, what I believe I see in my visions, which is the only reason I follow Raja Yoga. Research Raja Yoga and the Brahma Kumaris too to get more insight. The stars and dashes later on, before I start writing dates, represent different days. You might see the occasional star next to a word; it’s a below note. The EDITS you see riddled throughout are as Word Comments, some of them dated, some of them not. I got a crush on a cartoon character a few years ago, it came back to haunt me, that’s all you need to know for now.
Also, I was a little mentally unstable at the beginning, but I address these issues later on. You’ll find my imaginary lover quite amusing. Anyway, read on.
[A1]You may be thinking something sceptical like “Teen diary. What makes it better than any Livejournal blog?” My answer is that this is a blog primarily addressing writers, gamers and spiritualists, which the average reader should find something in to sustain their interest. I am essentially a videogame-generation writer.

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Nykimbur

Take the second option. I only choose a select few excerpts to post at one time.

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WriterJohnB

Quote: As such, you’ll find it’s somehwat above average.

There's no such word as somehwat. I think you must have meant sometwat.


JohnB

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http://www.johnbushore.com

Nykimbur

Oh WOW, how did I know someone was gonna pick up on my ONE spelling mistake, well fucking done.

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Necromortis

I do believe people have been picking on your attitude, inability to take suggestions which you initially asked for, and the entire concept as well.

But I digress...

~Christian